the "things you wish you could say" thread

[Istiblennius]

I'm tired too. I have anxiety too. I have all kinds of important things going on outside of our classroom too. And on top of all that I have to deal with you and your self-absorbed nonsense. Part of my job is to help you learn to manage your time and energy so you can be successful here and in the next stages of your life, even though your cat just got spayed and needs extra cuddles.

[secundem_artem]

I'm tired too. I have anxiety too. I have all kinds of important things going on outside of our classroom too. And on top of all that I have to deal with you and your self-absorbed nonsense. Part of my job is to help you learn to manage your time and energy so you can be successful here and in the next stages of your life, even though your cat just got spayed and needs extra cuddles.

Jeebus.  I learned my mother had died, then I went to teach a class, and then I bought an airline ticket to fly home for the funeral.  Your cat got spayed and you need to miss a class?  Grow the hell up.

[ab_grp]

You? Running for office?! Yes, that is a completely ridiculous idea.  IMO, you are less competent to run for (let alone hold) office than probably anyone I know, including friends in prison who have actually killed people.  But thanks for the Halloween scare! If you want to "try something new," try paying your own rent.

[ergative]

Oh, honey. Has no one ever taught you how to write a 'responses to reviewers'? Because this isn't it. Two paragraphs of earnestness and humility and a general statement that you have incorporated the many useful suggestions do not replace a point-by-point response to each issue raised in the reviews.

[science.expat]

You need to say this if the response hasn't been submitted! I teach/mentor this stuff to early career researchers as it's essential knowledge.

[ergative]

You need to say this if the response hasn't been submitted! I teach/mentor this stuff to early career researchers as it's essential knowledge.

No, alas, the response was submitted already. I was one of the reviewers, which is why I saw it. However, because I sign my reviews, the author actually got in touch with me during their revision process to ask me to send them an article I'd recommended they read. So the line of communication is open. I might wait until the decision is made, and then send a kind email directly to them.

[Puget]

You need to say this if the response hasn't been submitted! I teach/mentor this stuff to early career researchers as it's essential knowledge.

No, alas, the response was submitted already. I was one of the reviewers, which is why I saw it. However, because I sign my reviews, the author actually got in touch with me during their revision process to ask me to send them an article I'd recommended they read. So the line of communication is open. I might wait until the decision is made, and then send a kind email directly to them.

My question in these cases (presuming the first author is an ECR, in a multi-author field) is where is the senior author in all this? I would never let a resubmission out of my lab without working with the trainee on both the revisions and response letter and approving the final versions of both. Same when I get papers to review that were clearly not ready for submission. Besides annoying your colleagues and tarnishing your own reputation, it is serious dereliction of duty as a PI not to both teach these skills and scaffold them to set your trainees up for the best chance of success with publishing.

[Istiblennius]

Respect is a thing you earn. When I remind you that you need to do a key part of your job, it is not disrespecting you. But your behavior is definitely ensuring you won't be earning my respect.

[Dismal]

I pointed out to you twice in August that your new PhD student did not have the prereqs for the advanced stats course you wanted him to take. Now we need to take special action to get him a 'W' for withdrawal past the drop date. The first sentence of your recent response was "I am perplexed by your tone." LOL. I want to send you links to the concept of tone policing. Tone policing is done by those who want to divert attention away from the problem at hand and divert attention toward the supposed emotional problems of another. Also more likely to be done by men to women and by white women to women of color.

[ergative]

You need to say this if the response hasn't been submitted! I teach/mentor this stuff to early career researchers as it's essential knowledge.

No, alas, the response was submitted already. I was one of the reviewers, which is why I saw it. However, because I sign my reviews, the author actually got in touch with me during their revision process to ask me to send them an article I'd recommended they read. So the line of communication is open. I might wait until the decision is made, and then send a kind email directly to them.

My question in these cases (presuming the first author is an ECR, in a multi-author field) is where is the senior author in all this? I would never let a resubmission out of my lab without working with the trainee on both the revisions and response letter and approving the final versions of both. Same when I get papers to review that were clearly not ready for submission. Besides annoying your colleagues and tarnishing your own reputation, it is serious dereliction of duty as a PI not to both teach these skills and scaffold them to set your trainees up for the best chance of success with publishing.

My field kind of straddles the boundary here. It's not at all unusual for papers to be single-authored. I think this one was, too, although it was properly blinded until the (first?) author contacted me. Although, to be sure, the reason I think it was single-authored was because, as you say, there was no senior author to catch this.

[fishbrains]

Yes, college courses become much more difficult when students don't show the f*ck up to class. Why is that such a shocker to you?

[AmLitHist]

This semester needs to END, already.

(Wait.  I think I've been saying that since August.)

[OneMoreYear]

This semester needs to END, already.

(Wait.  I think I've been saying that since August.)

+ googolplex. If I survive this semester, I'm never putting up with all of this crap again. No one else wants to hold the line with me?  Fine, fire me.

[evil_physics_witchcraft]

This semester needs to END, already.

(Wait.  I think I've been saying that since August.)

+ googolplex. If I survive this semester, I'm never putting up with all of this crap again. No one else wants to hold the line with me?  Fine, fire me.

Yep to both.

[the_geneticist]

This semester needs to END, already.[/b]

(Wait.  I think I've been saying that since August.)

+10000

And I'm on 10 week quarters that started in late September!