Favorite student emails

[research_prof]

Excerpted:

Some of the questions in this quiz is beyond the expectation of our classmates, and it is also the first quiz.

I mean... two questions in the randomizer were particularly tricky, that's true, but not impossible. And it sucks if you got them both (this student didn't), but them's the breaks, and each one was worth 1 point out of 15. Besides, the expectations that matter here are mine!

I might be more concerned if this was the first time I was teaching this class, but it's the eighth.

Ah yes, the Designated Spokesperson student.  They are shocked, shocked I say, that you would dare to give them a quiz they can't ace without any effort.

Dear Student,
Thank you for your email.  The quizzes are intended as practice to test your skills & knowledge.  The challenge level is consistent with the set learning goals and objectives of this course.  If you would like to chat about how to solve any particular problem, please come to my office hours.
Best,
Dr. Geneticist

Don't you just love hearing from the self-appointed "Designated Spokesperson"? Very often it's just the opinion of that one student or at the most, Stu and Stu's friend.

I have a designated spokesperson this year in one of my two-semester courses.  He never fails to let me know what I'm doing wrong (everything!).  So far, I have been accused of making the course harder than it needs to be, giving them too much homework, not giving them enough practice problems, giving them too many practice problems (the email with this one also included a request that I create a new, all-encompassing practice assignment the night before the final exam), and being excessively rigid and lacking in compassion because I insist that grades in the course correlate to demonstrated levels of proficiency instead of giving them the grades they want or think they deserve based on the time they have invested.
The most recent email came during winter break and included details of how I should change the course structure and the way I teach the course to make it more similar to the way the course is taught in person.  You will not be surprised to learn that his description of how the course is normally taught was not even remotely accurate.  He proposed allowing the class to vote because he was sure they would all agree with him.

I used to love teaching this course.  He has made me hate it.

Better hope they pass the class so you don't have to have them again.  Or if they fail, it's so damn obvious that they won't be able to convince anyone that you were unfair or biased.

Time to start saying: directions for the quiz are in the assignment instructions; the due dates for the assignments are in the syllabus; etc.  Or only replying to emails that actually ask a question.  For ones that don't, you could always write back "Did you have a specific question?  Please clarify."

During my first time teaching an American Lit. summer course and only my second semester as a new adjunct, I had a student stand up (and I mean literally stand up) on the 2nd day of class and rail at me for a good three or four minutes about how the course had too much reading, the syllabus policies weren't fair, and that "everyone in the class" wanted me to make significant changes to the course immediately (everything had come from a master syllabus I had been given by the division). I didn't know no better, and I said, "Huh. Well, that's the class, and your opinion about how the course will work doesn't really matter. I mean, jeez, get a refund if you're this unhappy already." I may have laughed at him a little. He stormed out very dramatically, and he didn't come back. Never heard anything from anybody at the College about it.

Some days I miss my younger, ignorant, unfiltered self who didn't have a real job or a career to lose.

Not sure how many years back that happened, but I guess today someone could very well get fired for saying something like that.

[Chemystery]

Excerpted:

Some of the questions in this quiz is beyond the expectation of our classmates, and it is also the first quiz.

I mean... two questions in the randomizer were particularly tricky, that's true, but not impossible. And it sucks if you got them both (this student didn't), but them's the breaks, and each one was worth 1 point out of 15. Besides, the expectations that matter here are mine!

I might be more concerned if this was the first time I was teaching this class, but it's the eighth.

Ah yes, the Designated Spokesperson student.  They are shocked, shocked I say, that you would dare to give them a quiz they can't ace without any effort.

Dear Student,
Thank you for your email.  The quizzes are intended as practice to test your skills & knowledge.  The challenge level is consistent with the set learning goals and objectives of this course.  If you would like to chat about how to solve any particular problem, please come to my office hours.
Best,
Dr. Geneticist

Don't you just love hearing from the self-appointed "Designated Spokesperson"? Very often it's just the opinion of that one student or at the most, Stu and Stu's friend.

I have a designated spokesperson this year in one of my two-semester courses.  He never fails to let me know what I'm doing wrong (everything!).  So far, I have been accused of making the course harder than it needs to be, giving them too much homework, not giving them enough practice problems, giving them too many practice problems (the email with this one also included a request that I create a new, all-encompassing practice assignment the night before the final exam), and being excessively rigid and lacking in compassion because I insist that grades in the course correlate to demonstrated levels of proficiency instead of giving them the grades they want or think they deserve based on the time they have invested.
The most recent email came during winter break and included details of how I should change the course structure and the way I teach the course to make it more similar to the way the course is taught in person.  You will not be surprised to learn that his description of how the course is normally taught was not even remotely accurate.  He proposed allowing the class to vote because he was sure they would all agree with him.

I used to love teaching this course.  He has made me hate it.

Better hope they pass the class so you don't have to have them again.  Or if they fail, it's so damn obvious that they won't be able to convince anyone that you were unfair or biased.

Time to start saying: directions for the quiz are in the assignment instructions; the due dates for the assignments are in the syllabus; etc.  Or only replying to emails that actually ask a question.  For ones that don't, you could always write back "Did you have a specific question?  Please clarify."

Chemystery, I wouldn't engage with this student either. You're in charge of designing and teaching the course. If your student wants to tell you how to teach the course, you could tell him to address his concerns with your chair.

I'm assuming that you are young and female. When you respond to emails such as the ones from your student, the student sees this as the first step in a negotiation.

Female, but not young.  Also tenured.  Still, my direction from my dean is that I must continue to respond to the student supportively.  To be clear, the dean is not suggesting I should do any of the things the student asks, just that I should smother him with helpfulness.  Because retention.  So I am only able to fantasize about ignoring his emails or sending a response that reads "To save us both time, I will just assume that you believe everything I do is wrong.  There is no need to email me updates.  I will no longer respond to such emails."

[FishProf]

I had a freshie class once that decided (at least a self-appointed leader did) that the class was too hard, and not appropriate as an introductory course to the major.

After a longish pause, I said "You are all freshman in your very first college science course.  How the hell would YOU know what is appropriate for this course?  I'll stick with what the entire department decided the class should contain, thanks".

Self-appointed stormed out.

The next day he showed up at the department demanding to speak with the Chair.  So the secretary showed him in...to me.

Short meeting.

[mamselle]

Bada-bing!

M.

[fishbrains]

Excerpted:

Some of the questions in this quiz is beyond the expectation of our classmates, and it is also the first quiz.

I mean... two questions in the randomizer were particularly tricky, that's true, but not impossible. And it sucks if you got them both (this student didn't), but them's the breaks, and each one was worth 1 point out of 15. Besides, the expectations that matter here are mine!

I might be more concerned if this was the first time I was teaching this class, but it's the eighth.

Ah yes, the Designated Spokesperson student.  They are shocked, shocked I say, that you would dare to give them a quiz they can't ace without any effort.

Dear Student,
Thank you for your email.  The quizzes are intended as practice to test your skills & knowledge.  The challenge level is consistent with the set learning goals and objectives of this course.  If you would like to chat about how to solve any particular problem, please come to my office hours.
Best,
Dr. Geneticist

Don't you just love hearing from the self-appointed "Designated Spokesperson"? Very often it's just the opinion of that one student or at the most, Stu and Stu's friend.

I have a designated spokesperson this year in one of my two-semester courses.  He never fails to let me know what I'm doing wrong (everything!).  So far, I have been accused of making the course harder than it needs to be, giving them too much homework, not giving them enough practice problems, giving them too many practice problems (the email with this one also included a request that I create a new, all-encompassing practice assignment the night before the final exam), and being excessively rigid and lacking in compassion because I insist that grades in the course correlate to demonstrated levels of proficiency instead of giving them the grades they want or think they deserve based on the time they have invested.
The most recent email came during winter break and included details of how I should change the course structure and the way I teach the course to make it more similar to the way the course is taught in person.  You will not be surprised to learn that his description of how the course is normally taught was not even remotely accurate.  He proposed allowing the class to vote because he was sure they would all agree with him.

I used to love teaching this course.  He has made me hate it.

Better hope they pass the class so you don't have to have them again.  Or if they fail, it's so damn obvious that they won't be able to convince anyone that you were unfair or biased.

Time to start saying: directions for the quiz are in the assignment instructions; the due dates for the assignments are in the syllabus; etc.  Or only replying to emails that actually ask a question.  For ones that don't, you could always write back "Did you have a specific question?  Please clarify."

During my first time teaching an American Lit. summer course and only my second semester as a new adjunct, I had a student stand up (and I mean literally stand up) on the 2nd day of class and rail at me for a good three or four minutes about how the course had too much reading, the syllabus policies weren't fair, and that "everyone in the class" wanted me to make significant changes to the course immediately (everything had come from a master syllabus I had been given by the division). I didn't know no better, and I said, "Huh. Well, that's the class, and your opinion about how the course will work doesn't really matter. I mean, jeez, get a refund if you're this unhappy already." I may have laughed at him a little. He stormed out very dramatically, and he didn't come back. Never heard anything from anybody at the College about it.

Some days I miss my younger, ignorant, unfiltered self who didn't have a real job or a career to lose.

Not sure how many years back that happened, but I guess today someone could very well get fired for saying something like that.

It was a different millennium. For sure.

Today, I'd give an extended lecture on gen-ed learning outcomes, curriculum development processes, required alignment with division syllabi, and on-and-on. Basically, I'd say the same thing to the student, but couch it all in enough jargon and gobbledygook to keep myself out of trouble. Gotta find our fun where we can.

[Langue_doc]

FishProf, the look on your student's face, as the old Mastercard commercial would say, must have been priceless.

fishbrains, I admire your response. I once had to tell a spokes-student that the class wasn't a democracy. This was a writing course, one of many sections, the syllabus and grading policies of which had to conform to departmental guidelines. The heavily weighted final essay would be scored by two colleagues, so I had nip rebellion in the bud.

Chemystery, my sympathies. Support, indeed. Bah humbug.

[Langue_doc]

Stu who doesn't have a clue about what to do for this course and keeps emailing me instead of reading the modules, directions for the assignments, and the uploaded handouts.

"Also I was confused on the assignment. I see the prompts where it says to discuss one of the [topics] [verb here] by [X]. But I don't see the question to respond to." Stu, all you have to do is discuss one of the topics.

I don't know how to respond to this student. Stu has to read. There is no substitute for reading the information in the modules and the assignment directions. Stu is majoring in one of the professions and needs to earn a B in this course to stay in Stu's program. It's too early for midterm warnings. Stu is thoroughly unprepared for hu's major.

I'll have to come up with a plan for this student.

[downer]

Stu who doesn't have a clue about what to do for this course and keeps emailing me instead of reading the modules, directions for the assignments, and the uploaded handouts.

"Also I was confused on the assignment. I see the prompts where it says to discuss one of the [topics] [verb here] by [X]. But I don't see the question to respond to." Stu, all you have to do is discuss one of the topics.

I don't know how to respond to this student. Stu has to read. There is no substitute for reading the information in the modules and the assignment directions. Stu is majoring in one of the professions and needs to earn a B in this course to stay in Stu's program. It's too early for midterm warnings. Stu is thoroughly unprepared for hu's major.

I'll have to come up with a plan for this student.

I have a discussion section in all my online courses where students can ask questions about the course and what they have to do. I tell students that they should not email me questions: they need to ask questions in the discussion forum. Then I or other students can answer questions, I can provide links to videos about how to submit work etc, and I suspect that students may be a little more cautious about not asking stupid questions. I think it has cut down on the number of clueless emails I get.

[ciao_yall]

Stu who doesn't have a clue about what to do for this course and keeps emailing me instead of reading the modules, directions for the assignments, and the uploaded handouts.

"Also I was confused on the assignment. I see the prompts where it says to discuss one of the [topics] [verb here] by [X]. But I don't see the question to respond to." Stu, all you have to do is discuss one of the topics.

I don't know how to respond to this student. Stu has to read. There is no substitute for reading the information in the modules and the assignment directions. Stu is majoring in one of the professions and needs to earn a B in this course to stay in Stu's program. It's too early for midterm warnings. Stu is thoroughly unprepared for hu's major.

I'll have to come up with a plan for this student.

Some students are so used to the "plug and chug" model of education that "discuss your own interpretation" kinda blows their mind. I basically spend a little quality time with that student. For example, reframe the instruction "discuss" as a series of questions for that student. What do you think of X? Why might others disagree?

[apl68]

Genuine favorite:

Dear Ergative,

I'm really enjoying the [topic] module in [second-year intro course]. It has been my favorite topic thus far. I was wondering if this is a 5-week strand or if we will continue to study it for the rest of the semester. Also, is there an option to study [topic] in third year? Thanks [smiley emoji].

Awwww!

Congratulations on really connecting with a student!

[the_geneticist]

Excerpted:

Some of the questions in this quiz is beyond the expectation of our classmates, and it is also the first quiz.

I mean... two questions in the randomizer were particularly tricky, that's true, but not impossible. And it sucks if you got them both (this student didn't), but them's the breaks, and each one was worth 1 point out of 15. Besides, the expectations that matter here are mine!

I might be more concerned if this was the first time I was teaching this class, but it's the eighth.

Ah yes, the Designated Spokesperson student.  They are shocked, shocked I say, that you would dare to give them a quiz they can't ace without any effort.

Dear Student,
Thank you for your email.  The quizzes are intended as practice to test your skills & knowledge.  The challenge level is consistent with the set learning goals and objectives of this course.  If you would like to chat about how to solve any particular problem, please come to my office hours.
Best,
Dr. Geneticist

Don't you just love hearing from the self-appointed "Designated Spokesperson"? Very often it's just the opinion of that one student or at the most, Stu and Stu's friend.

I have a designated spokesperson this year in one of my two-semester courses.  He never fails to let me know what I'm doing wrong (everything!).  So far, I have been accused of making the course harder than it needs to be, giving them too much homework, not giving them enough practice problems, giving them too many practice problems (the email with this one also included a request that I create a new, all-encompassing practice assignment the night before the final exam), and being excessively rigid and lacking in compassion because I insist that grades in the course correlate to demonstrated levels of proficiency instead of giving them the grades they want or think they deserve based on the time they have invested.
The most recent email came during winter break and included details of how I should change the course structure and the way I teach the course to make it more similar to the way the course is taught in person.  You will not be surprised to learn that his description of how the course is normally taught was not even remotely accurate.  He proposed allowing the class to vote because he was sure they would all agree with him.

I used to love teaching this course.  He has made me hate it.

Better hope they pass the class so you don't have to have them again.  Or if they fail, it's so damn obvious that they won't be able to convince anyone that you were unfair or biased.

Time to start saying: directions for the quiz are in the assignment instructions; the due dates for the assignments are in the syllabus; etc.  Or only replying to emails that actually ask a question.  For ones that don't, you could always write back "Did you have a specific question?  Please clarify."

Chemystery, I wouldn't engage with this student either. You're in charge of designing and teaching the course. If your student wants to tell you how to teach the course, you could tell him to address his concerns with your chair.

I'm assuming that you are young and female. When you respond to emails such as the ones from your student, the student sees this as the first step in a negotiation.

Female, but not young.  Also tenured.  Still, my direction from my dean is that I must continue to respond to the student supportively.  To be clear, the dean is not suggesting I should do any of the things the student asks, just that I should smother him with helpfulness.  Because retention.  So I am only able to fantasize about ignoring his emails or sending a response that reads "To save us both time, I will just assume that you believe everything I do is wrong.  There is no need to email me updates.  I will no longer respond to such emails."

Ugh.  I officially dislike your department chair (and I've had that sort of chair). 
Maybe treat every email as an opportunity to ooze helpfulness and say things like "Many students have trouble figuring out how to approach this material.  I'm happy to chat with you about pedagogically-sound study methods during my office hours."
Or "If you need assistance in determining how to prioritize your studies, the Student Help Center is free and available to all students."
"Would you like to come to my office hours to discuss how to best make use of the suggested practice problems?"
Go for a slightly-baffled, very friendly tone.

[Langue_doc]

Stu who doesn't have a clue about what to do for this course and keeps emailing me instead of reading the modules, directions for the assignments, and the uploaded handouts.

"Also I was confused on the assignment. I see the prompts where it says to discuss one of the [topics] [verb here] by [X]. But I don't see the question to respond to." Stu, all you have to do is discuss one of the topics.

I don't know how to respond to this student. Stu has to read. There is no substitute for reading the information in the modules and the assignment directions. Stu is majoring in one of the professions and needs to earn a B in this course to stay in Stu's program. It's too early for midterm warnings. Stu is thoroughly unprepared for hu's major.

I'll have to come up with a plan for this student.

I have a discussion section in all my online courses where students can ask questions about the course and what they have to do. I tell students that they should not email me questions: they need to ask questions in the discussion forum. Then I or other students can answer questions, I can provide links to videos about how to submit work etc, and I suspect that students may be a little more cautious about not asking stupid questions. I think it has cut down on the number of clueless emails I get.

Stu is genuinely confused as Stu hasn't read the modules or completed most of the assignments as evident from Stu's assignments and emails, including one that Stu sent after the lone quoted above. I'm going to wait until 5 PM to see if Stu completed the assignments and then send Stu a bulleted list of things to do so that Stu knows how to keep up with the readings and assignments. The modules have links to topics on how to submit assignments on Canvas, how to read the feedback and comments on their assignments, and a bunch of other topics. The modules have also examples of responses to the assignments.

I've been teaching this course for several semesters now, and the weekly discussion board responses (based on the readings and graded) are quite popular. These assignments have always been a requirement, even pre-pandemic, and students usually post as soon as I open up the discussion board for the week. This semester though, there are students who don't read the directions and have been responding to their classmates by merely stating that they agree with so-and-so, despite having access to examples of responses that earned full credit. Needless to say, they haven't read the information in the modules or the uploaded handouts and other documents.

Posted by: ciao_yall
« on: Today at 07:41:36 AM »Insert Quote
Quote from: Langue_doc on Today at 05:10:56 AM
Stu who doesn't have a clue about what to do for this course and keeps emailing me instead of reading the modules, directions for the assignments, and the uploaded handouts.

"Also I was confused on the assignment. I see the prompts where it says to discuss one of the [topics] [verb here] by [X]. But I don't see the question to respond to." Stu, all you have to do is discuss one of the topics.

I don't know how to respond to this student. Stu has to read. There is no substitute for reading the information in the modules and the assignment directions. Stu is majoring in one of the professions and needs to earn a B in this course to stay in Stu's program. It's too early for midterm warnings. Stu is thoroughly unprepared for hu's major.

I'll have to come up with a plan for this student.

Some students are so used to the "plug and chug" model of education that "discuss your own interpretation" kinda blows their mind. I basically spend a little quality time with that student. For example, reframe the instruction "discuss" as a series of questions for that student. What do you think of X? Why might others disagree?

This student has to read the modules. I did think of scheduling a meeting but no amount of my talking is going to help Stu unless Stu has read the modules. Students have already discussed other questions on the discussion board. Stu should be reading these and the model responses instead of scrolling through the assignments and expecting to understand the course content through osmosis. This is a course where occasionally students will say "Oh, but this is only [Course]. I won't be spending much time on it as my other courses are far more important." I've been frustrated with this student as Stu emails me every day, and occasionally sends a second email on the same topic. Answers to all the questions in the emails can be found by just scanning the modules.

[Caracal]

[quote author=Langue_doc
This student has to read the modules. I did think of scheduling a meeting but no amount of my talking is going to help Stu unless Stu has read the modules. Students have already discussed other questions on the discussion board. Stu should be reading these and the model responses instead of scrolling through the assignments and expecting to understand the course content through osmosis. This is a course where occasionally students will say "Oh, but this is only [Course]. I won't be spending much time on it as my other courses are far more important." I've been frustrated with this student as Stu emails me every day, and occasionally sends a second email on the same topic. Answers to all the questions in the emails can be found by just scanning the modules.

Emailing constantly, but also not doing any of the reading is a weird combination. I frequently have students who send emails right before something is due where they try to convince me that they are completely confused about the whole thing, and it must be my fault. That's just some combination of self deception and deflection.

However, this seems like a student who isn't able to follow instructions or grasp what's going on. Maybe a bigger picture conversation is called for?

[bacardiandlime]

From an advisee, who also addressed me by my first name:

"Am I right to assume it will be the same as last term - where we are taught the modules and then given assignments based on one the topics we have learnt? So, is this term essentially the same as last term?"

Um, yes, you take a class and there will be a test. WTF.

[mamselle]

^ Langued'oc....

Yes, and "making a plan" for all that intervention sounds more like trying to chew up and digest the instructions for the student.

F2F (or Zoom, safer) and lay-it-on-the-line, "I'm not your mother pelican" would be a simpler and more honest way to move this one along to maturity...

M.