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Started by bacardiandlime, January 30, 2020, 03:20:28 PM

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smallcleanrat

As someone who was struggling with bipolar depression before the mandate to shelter-in-place, I would really like to know how much of what I'm currently experiencing is less to do with mental illness and more to do with the unusual circumstances we are all living with.

As a result of pandemic-related stressors, including the loss of normal face-to-face interaction, has anyone else experienced any of the following?

1) Decreased success rate sticking to a regular hygiene routine (e.g. going days without showering or changing clothes)
2) Irregular eating and/or sleeping schedule
3) Missing time (i.e. realizing a significant chunk of time has passed that you cannot account for as you do not remember what you were doing)
4) A strong sense that your surroundings are not real, as though you were trapped in a dream or a video game
5) A feeling of being disconnected from your own body, such that you barely feel objects you are touching or actions you are performing and looking down at yourself or looking at your reflection gives a sense that you are looking at someone else

Liquidambar

Smallcleanrat, I'm hearing 1-3 from a lot of people.  I haven't heard about 4-5 from others.

I'm surprised at how much I've been sticking with my eating schedule because of classes.  (I eat breakfast before Zoom classes start and lunch after Zoom classes end.)  If I didn't have classes, my meals would be more disordered.  I'm appalled at how much I've skipped brushing my teeth, though, since students can't tell through Zoom.  Washing my hair hasn't been so great either.  That's with no current mental health issues, just feeling overwhelmed by online teaching.

Actually, regarding your #4, I feel like I'm in a post-apocalyptic novel when I go out in public.  It does feel a bit unreal.  I don't feel like that at home.
Let us think the unthinkable, let us do the undoable, let us prepare to grapple with the ineffable itself, and see if we may not eff it after all. ~ Dirk Gently

sylvie

Definitely 1-3 on a regular basis. And it's funny you should post this, because two days ago I felt unreal in the way you describe, sort of disassociated from my body in an unpleasant way, and also the feeling that I was trapped in some kind of purgatory (a feeling I haven't had in 28 years, since the last time I dropped acid at age 20). I felt completely normal the next morning and have felt okay since, but it was definitely a disturbing sense of unreality.

Caracal

Quote from: smallcleanrat on April 19, 2020, 08:45:55 PM
As someone who was struggling with bipolar depression before the mandate to shelter-in-place, I would really like to know how much of what I'm currently experiencing is less to do with mental illness and more to do with the unusual circumstances we are all living with.

As a result of pandemic-related stressors, including the loss of normal face-to-face interaction, has anyone else experienced any of the following?

1) Decreased success rate sticking to a regular hygiene routine (e.g. going days without showering or changing clothes)
2) Irregular eating and/or sleeping schedule
3) Missing time (i.e. realizing a significant chunk of time has passed that you cannot account for as you do not remember what you were doing)
4) A strong sense that your surroundings are not real, as though you were trapped in a dream or a video game
5) A feeling of being disconnected from your own body, such that you barely feel objects you are touching or actions you are performing and looking down at yourself or looking at your reflection gives a sense that you are looking at someone else

1. Yes, definitely. Maybe not like days on end but I definitely have gotten to the end of the day and realized I'm still wearing all the same clothes as the day before. In normal times I take a shower and change clothes before I go somewhere where I'm going to see people, even if it is just the coffee shop. Now I have to remember to do it without that trigger.
2. No, but I live with my partner and a toddler so that tends to regulate those things. (and disregulate others) It wouldn't be strange to have trouble regulating  when you aren't leaving the house.
3. Depends what you mean. I'm definitely having more trouble focusing and wasting more time, but I know what I've been doing.
4-5. Sound more like the issues you've discussed before. It wouldn't be particularly surprising if they are being exacerbated by the other stuff. I hope you're still able to see a therapist/psychologist remotely. It might be worth really trying to establish a more regular schedule and see if that helps some. Get up at roughly the same time, go to bed by certain times, go for a walk, come back, take a shower etc.

pigou

Quote from: Liquidambar on April 19, 2020, 09:34:56 PM
Actually, regarding your #4, I feel like I'm in a post-apocalyptic novel when I go out in public.  It does feel a bit unreal.  I don't feel like that at home.

I second this. I was leaving my apartment building to get some coffee this morning and someone from DHL came with a bunch of packages. I ended up waiting and holding the door for him... which in normal days would be obvious/trivial. But he ended up being so appreciative and said people just aren't doing that right now, because of the virus. (But I bet they're happy to get the packages he's delivering.)

It strikes me that, collectively, we've flipped from one absurd behavior (going to beaches and bars as if nothing happened) to another. Social distancing is sensible and important, but not all forms of it impose the same cost or have the same benefits. Talking to someone wearing (surgical) masks isn't particularly risky, but probably has lots of mental health benefits. Holding the door for someone imposes virtually zero risk (none if you get behind the door as you hold it) and so much social benefit.

I don't think these all-or-nothing policies are necessary. As we see in Sweden, with no lock down, people are still practicing social distancing, just not as extremely. And we have data on this from the US, too: even states that didn't issue shelter-in-place orders saw a rapid drop of restaurant reservations. Anecdotes of some packed diner aside, the location data from smartphones also suggests people started staying at home before the orders came into place. They just continue to go to beaches and parks, where social distancing is actually pretty easy to do. A 6 foot distance between people who don't live together is easily maintained and someone walking past you (without yelling in your face) poses a very low risk of infection. If that were not true, we'd all be infected by now.

apl68

I haven't experienced any of the symptoms smallcleanrat lists.  I do sleep more now than I did, but that was a side effect of medication that I began taking shortly before the pandemic hit.  I've always been a creature of habit.  My routines tend to be hard to disrupt too drastically.  I'm also in a position to continue physically going in to work most days.  Saturdays and Sundays are the strangest days.  On Saturdays I no longer go in to work, except briefly to check on the building.  On Sundays I now go to my office to use my computer to attend a virtual church service, instead of actually going to church.

The stressers are still getting to me somewhat.  My productivity at work has gone down considerably.  It's harder for me to focus on tasks.  I don't spend a lot of time worrying about stuff--at least not more than usual.  But the general emergency and changes in society and at work are definitely proving a distraction.  As much as anything I feel a huge frustration at not being able to do my job of serving the public the way I feel I should be. 

See, your King is coming to you, just and bringing salvation, gentle and lowly, and riding upon a donkey.

apl68

Our community has been fortunate in some ways at this time.  We're a small town, fairly isolated, in a rural state where the state leadership has done a credible job of responding.  Our state has had some of the very lowest rates of infection in the nation, despite being right next door to a hot-spot state.  Our main employer is a toilet-paper factory, which is now working full-blast to satisfy accelerated demand.  We've had a single verified Covid-19 death in our county thus far.

But it's still a tough time.  I know multiple people who have had loved ones go to the hospital (for non-virus issues) in the state capital, without their being able to go there with them.  One friend and fellow church member of mine died there by himself just last week.  His funeral will be the second that our pastor has had to preach where only a handful of family will be able to be present.  Today my parents, who live across the state, are beginning the first of a series of two-hour round trips to take Mom to have radiation therapy treatments.  That won't be easy on them at their age.

The newly-deceased friend I just mentioned above was also our town's Mayor.  He had been under a great deal of stress trying to deal with the challenges to the community posed by the pandemic.  He also had chronic health problems, chronic issues with a member of the family, and was coming up on the anniversary of his beloved wife's death.  All the strain was just too much for him.  We can't hold a proper funeral for him, so today the city is holding a funeral procession.  Citizens will be able to pay their respects and maintain social distancing as the procession goes down the street.  It's the best we can do right now.
See, your King is coming to you, just and bringing salvation, gentle and lowly, and riding upon a donkey.

mahagonny

#397
Quote from: smallcleanrat on April 19, 2020, 08:45:55 PM
As someone who was struggling with bipolar depression before the mandate to shelter-in-place, I would really like to know how much of what I'm currently experiencing is less to do with mental illness and more to do with the unusual circumstances we are all living with.

As a result of pandemic-related stressors, including the loss of normal face-to-face interaction, has anyone else experienced any of the following?

1) Decreased success rate sticking to a regular hygiene routine (e.g. going days without showering or changing clothes)
2) Irregular eating and/or sleeping schedule
3) Missing time (i.e. realizing a significant chunk of time has passed that you cannot account for as you do not remember what you were doing)
4) A strong sense that your surroundings are not real, as though you were trapped in a dream or a video game
5) A feeling of being disconnected from your own body, such that you barely feel objects you are touching or actions you are performing and looking down at yourself or looking at your reflection gives a sense that you are looking at someone else

#4 and #5 are derealization and depersonalization disorder, and probably have to do with you how are using the forum as you currently are. (I'm glad you are keeping in touch and I know you've been asked to; I wouldn't dissuade you). But you are using the forum in order to make  your world seem more real to you. Perhaps you are experiencing this in response to a traumatic life event. I believe I mentioned before, I have personal history with derealization. I would take a wild guess and say the feelings of derealization are somewhat abated after reading the forum, temporarily.
Derealization is difficult to endure but passes.
I recommend keeping up with personal hygiene and dressing up for work on zoom (within reason). I always shave before going on and teaching. It makes me feel more grounded.

spork

https://www.nytimes.com/2020/04/20/opinion/coronavirus-testing-pneumonia.html

So does anyone know what the most reliable/accurate pulse oximeters are for home use?
It's terrible writing, used to obfuscate the fact that the authors actually have nothing to say.

pigou

Quote from: spork on April 20, 2020, 03:10:35 PM
https://www.nytimes.com/2020/04/20/opinion/coronavirus-testing-pneumonia.html

So does anyone know what the most reliable/accurate pulse oximeters are for home use?
I checked a couple weeks ago and they were all sold out on Amazon, and very limited supply on eBay. I suspect it may be hard to get any at this point.

Vkw10

Quote from: smallcleanrat on April 19, 2020, 08:45:55 PM
As someone who was struggling with bipolar depression before the mandate to shelter-in-place, I would really like to know how much of what I'm currently experiencing is less to do with mental illness and more to do with the unusual circumstances we are all living with.

As a result of pandemic-related stressors, including the loss of normal face-to-face interaction, has anyone else experienced any of the following?

1) Decreased success rate sticking to a regular hygiene routine (e.g. going days without showering or changing clothes)
2) Irregular eating and/or sleeping schedule
3) Missing time (i.e. realizing a significant chunk of time has passed that you cannot account for as you do not remember what you were doing)
4) A strong sense that your surroundings are not real, as though you were trapped in a dream or a video game
5) A feeling of being disconnected from your own body, such that you barely feel objects you are touching or actions you are performing and looking down at yourself or looking at your reflection gives a sense that you are looking at someone else

I was struggling with the first three. I now have a daily task chart, where I mark off personal routines as I do them. Tasks include shower, floss,  write meal plan, lay out clothing for next day, etc. I also set alarms on phone to remind myself of mealtimes and bedtime. I use my Amazon Echo to help myself stay aware of time, setting 30-minute reminders for myself like, "You started reading at 6:30. Time for a walk?"
Enthusiasm is not a skill set. (MH)

spork

Quote from: pigou on April 20, 2020, 04:17:04 PM
Quote from: spork on April 20, 2020, 03:10:35 PM
https://www.nytimes.com/2020/04/20/opinion/coronavirus-testing-pneumonia.html

So does anyone know what the most reliable/accurate pulse oximeters are for home use?
I checked a couple weeks ago and they were all sold out on Amazon, and very limited supply on eBay. I suspect it may be hard to get any at this point.

Amazon is listing dozens of models, some in stock now and others listed as next in stock on May 2 or 3.
It's terrible writing, used to obfuscate the fact that the authors actually have nothing to say.

att_mtt

Quote from: smallcleanrat on April 19, 2020, 08:45:55 PM
As someone who was struggling with bipolar depression before the mandate to shelter-in-place, I would really like to know how much of what I'm currently experiencing is less to do with mental illness and more to do with the unusual circumstances we are all living with.

As a result of pandemic-related stressors, including the loss of normal face-to-face interaction, has anyone else experienced any of the following?

1) Decreased success rate sticking to a regular hygiene routine (e.g. going days without showering or changing clothes)
2) Irregular eating and/or sleeping schedule
3) Missing time (i.e. realizing a significant chunk of time has passed that you cannot account for as you do not remember what you were doing)
4) A strong sense that your surroundings are not real, as though you were trapped in a dream or a video game
5) A feeling of being disconnected from your own body, such that you barely feel objects you are touching or actions you are performing and looking down at yourself or looking at your reflection gives a sense that you are looking at someone else

I have heard from several people (which all normally don't have any particular mental health struggles) that they have experienced that and I think it is very common. I especially heard it from people that normally do not structure their day themselves. Everyone that has been working from home before seemed to be better. I found this article helpful: https://markmanson.net/coronavirus-mental-health-crisis
For me it's all about routine at the moment, even normally I detest routine. Now I get up at the same time every day, shower, eat, everything just to make sure I don't forget anything. However, productivity has massively dropped, which is also okay.
There are three articles on Karen Kelskeys blog, which I found useful: http://theprofessorisin.com/2020/04/02/adapting-to-disaster-episode-one-security-a-guest-post/
Maybe you already know these articles but I hope that you can find something useful and that you will feel a bit better soon.

smallcleanrat

Quote from: att_mtt on April 21, 2020, 10:20:57 AM
Quote from: smallcleanrat on April 19, 2020, 08:45:55 PM
As someone who was struggling with bipolar depression before the mandate to shelter-in-place, I would really like to know how much of what I'm currently experiencing is less to do with mental illness and more to do with the unusual circumstances we are all living with.

As a result of pandemic-related stressors, including the loss of normal face-to-face interaction, has anyone else experienced any of the following?

1) Decreased success rate sticking to a regular hygiene routine (e.g. going days without showering or changing clothes)
2) Irregular eating and/or sleeping schedule
3) Missing time (i.e. realizing a significant chunk of time has passed that you cannot account for as you do not remember what you were doing)
4) A strong sense that your surroundings are not real, as though you were trapped in a dream or a video game
5) A feeling of being disconnected from your own body, such that you barely feel objects you are touching or actions you are performing and looking down at yourself or looking at your reflection gives a sense that you are looking at someone else

I have heard from several people (which all normally don't have any particular mental health struggles) that they have experienced that and I think it is very common. I especially heard it from people that normally do not structure their day themselves. Everyone that has been working from home before seemed to be better. I found this article helpful: https://markmanson.net/coronavirus-mental-health-crisis
For me it's all about routine at the moment, even normally I detest routine. Now I get up at the same time every day, shower, eat, everything just to make sure I don't forget anything. However, productivity has massively dropped, which is also okay.
There are three articles on Karen Kelskeys blog, which I found useful: http://theprofessorisin.com/2020/04/02/adapting-to-disaster-episode-one-security-a-guest-post/
Maybe you already know these articles but I hope that you can find something useful and that you will feel a bit better soon.

Good links, att_mtt. Thanks for those.

I know from experience I do much better with routine. I've been marking down what tends to throw me off my routine these days (other than the lack of accustomed daily markers like heading out the door to work) and more often than not it's either pain, nausea, or other issues related to chronic illness. Does anyone have tips for making a routine more adaptable for times when interruptions are frequent and difficult to avoid?

Parasaurolophus

FWIW:


Quote from: smallcleanrat on April 19, 2020, 08:45:55 PM

As a result of pandemic-related stressors, including the loss of normal face-to-face interaction, has anyone else experienced any of the following?

1) Decreased success rate sticking to a regular hygiene routine (e.g. going days without showering or changing clothes)
2) Irregular eating and/or sleeping schedule
3) Missing time (i.e. realizing a significant chunk of time has passed that you cannot account for as you do not remember what you were doing)

Yes, to varying extents. I live with my partner, however, so there's a kind of externalization of responsibility for (1) and (2) that we both find helpful. If we were each on our own, it would be a very different story.

Quote
4) A strong sense that your surroundings are not real, as though you were trapped in a dream or a video game
5) A feeling of being disconnected from your own body, such that you barely feel objects you are touching or actions you are performing and looking down at yourself or looking at your reflection gives a sense that you are looking at someone else

Nope.
I know it's a genus.