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RIP mamselle

Started by mystictechgal, January 01, 2023, 09:55:43 AM

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lightning

As one who did not know Mamselle's RL identity, I can unequivocally say that I have no interest in knowing her RL identity. I only knew her as an online person named Mamselle. Knowing her RL identity would add nothing to my immense appreciation for her and her monumental presence here in the fora while she was still alive.

I remember on the old CHE forums when the news of the passing of Prytania3 was announced. Someone revealed Pry's name. I was curious, so I googled. I soon forgot Pry's real name, because that was not the real Prytania3 to me. The "real" Prytania3, to me, was the online text-based representation in the CHE fora.

Although it may be tempting to want to know, knowledge of Mamselle's real identity is neither necessary nor appropriate.

kaysixteen

I do know her name, one of maybe a half dozen or so I have learned over the years.    I am wondering how these fora would work if we did post under our real ids, like 90s-style listservs?

bacardiandlime

Quote from: lightning on January 05, 2023, 09:42:54 PM
I remember on the old CHE forums when the news of the passing of Prytania3 was announced. Someone revealed Pry's name.

That was Prytania's son, who was gracious enough to come on (on her account) and share news of her passing with the group, because he knew she was an active member. I think a family member can make that choice. It's not for the rest of us to out people.

fishbrains

Quote from: lightning on January 05, 2023, 09:42:54 PM
As one who did not know Mamselle's RL identity, I can unequivocally say that I have no interest in knowing her RL identity. I only knew her as an online person named Mamselle. Knowing her RL identity would add nothing to my immense appreciation for her and her monumental presence here in the fora while she was still alive.

I remember on the old CHE forums when the news of the passing of Prytania3 was announced. Someone revealed Pry's name. I was curious, so I googled. I soon forgot Pry's real name, because that was not the real Prytania3 to me. The "real" Prytania3, to me, was the online text-based representation in the CHE fora.

Although it may be tempting to want to know, knowledge of Mamselle's real identity is neither necessary nor appropriate.

I agree. After her response to "I, Tonya" on the movie thread, I started seeing Mamselle ice skating while she was posting. Making others just a little bigger than "real" life is a fun component of a fora like this, at least for me.
I wish I could find a way to show people how much I love them, despite all my words and actions. ~ Maria Bamford

pink_

I'm just seeing the news now, and I'm saddened by our loss.

I haven't met many forumites offline, but I feel lucky to have met her. She reached out to me over DM because I had posted that I would be in her city--not knowing that it was her city--for an event in 2019. She was a lovely and warm person, both here and IRL.

I'm sorry that our paths didn't cross again. Thank you for posting this news.

Bbmaj7b5

This is awfully sad news. I had a conference in her city a few years back and we arranged to meet in the lobby of my hotel. We got some warm beverages and sat down to talk. Despite the wide gulf between our disciplines, we sat and talked for a couple of hours about research approaches, finding common ground much of the time. It was a lot of fun.

RIP, Mamselle.

hungry_ghost

Oh NO, what devastating news.

Mamselle!!

She was so incredibly generous and kind. I first interacted with her close to the start of my academic career--I think she was posting under a different moniker on the CHE fora. I never got to meet her in person but we exchanged many PMS.
I have been away from these boards for several months, and this is not what I expected to return to.

RIP, Mamselle.

pepsi_alum

Hi, all. I'm not really active here anymore, but I just heard the news and wanted to express my condolences. Mamselle was the best of us on the old CHE Fora -- consistently kind to others and a source of much support, both personally and professionalyl. I'm sorry to hear that her health deteriorated so quickly and I hope she was not in very much pain at the end. May her memory be a blessing.

--PepsiAlum (previously Mountainguy)

euro_trash

Nothing to add but sadness. She was a rock and helped me navigate a difficult time. She will be missed
spork in 2014: "It's a woe-is-me echo chamber."

niceday in 2011: "Euro_trash is blinded by his love for Endnote"

I'm kind of a hippy, love nature and my kids, and am still a believer: https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=3n4BPPaaoKc

tuxedo_cat

Hello old fora friends -- I have also not been posting lately on the new site here, and just learned of mamselle's passing during the past few days.  At first I only found a quick notification on the RIP thread, so I am very moved to see this long thread full of so much affection and deep appreciation of her presence here.

Another forumite was able to locate an obituary -- which I will not post here in keeping with our guidelines -- but it did mention a memorial service to take place on Sat. March 18.  I live in the same city and I am planning to attend. For those who did know her IRL who might want to meet to attend the service, please drop me a DM.  Rest in peace, mamselle -- you are a singular soul who has touched and enriched the lives of so many.

Thursday's_Child

I just found this on the second page of threads.  I don't think it belongs there, for two reasons:  1) because Mamselle touched so many lives here; and, 2) because so many forumites only sporadically check in, thus might miss it.  I've seen this happen in other on-line communities - asking about a familiar but absent voice, only to be told of their death, is not the best way to learn the sad news.

Might it be possible to pin this thread for the rest of the year?


Parasaurolophus

Quote from: Thursday's_Child on January 28, 2023, 08:31:25 AM

Might it be possible to pin this thread for the rest of the year?

Yes, done.

I pinned it initially, but then worried that it looked lost among the other pins, and figured it would be easier to see among the regular threads. But since posting here has slackened, a pin seems appropriate.
I know it's a genus.

aside

Returning after a long absence to this terrible news, I can only echo what others have said about Mamselle's kindness and her immense contributions to the fora.  Words fail...

Aside

AJ_Katz

I was wondering why the Fora had grown quiet over the last several weeks, and, alas, the answer is here. 

I will miss Mamselle's frequent posts and her optimistic and encouraging words.

Along with others, I have no need nor interest in knowing Mamselle's IRL identity.  She once messaged me about a comment I made that she worried my moniker and post would give away my identity, not knowing my moniker is an intentional red herring.  She was always very thoughtful and kind like that.  She will be missed.

nebo113

Quote from: bacardiandlime on January 06, 2023, 04:24:18 AM
Quote from: lightning on January 05, 2023, 09:42:54 PM
I remember on the old CHE forums when the news of the passing of Prytania3 was announced. Someone revealed Pry's name.

That was Prytania's son, who was gracious enough to come on (on her account) and share news of her passing with the group, because he knew she was an active member. I think a family member can make that choice. It's not for the rest of us to out people.

Pry was a crackerjack!  In a good way.