Here is a youtube link of Mabel and Olive's take on the Olympics:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gEw1KUCa7KE
Lately I have found that ESPN has hours long coverage of various Cornhole Championships! (Sponsored by Bush's Baked Beans and Johnsonville Sausage).
Darts could be added to the list as well. (I played too much darts in college, and sort of blew out my elbow!) (Also, darts contributed to beer drinking and included too much second hand smoke (and mass consumption of chicken wings!)
It also led to my room mate and I trying to play 'darts' with our hunting bows and arrows (in my grandparent's back yard at 50 yards). (We played for 7-11 ice cream sandwiches). (hay bales for the backstop, but we had problems with the 'board' so it turned into whoever missed the business card, bought the ice cream sandwiches. These days I dont know that I could SEE a business card at 50 yards! )
I think that I remember that there was a M*A*S*H* episode of Olympics that included "nurse carry".
So what would YOU nominate for future Olympics?
(Mabel, in the youtube video nominated Fox Shit Rolling).
Men's rhythmic gymnastics. Apparently it only exists in Japan as any kind of a serious sport, but my goodness is it fun to watch! (https://youtu.be/p3eMz1hxCk0?t=91) But at the same time, because it is no more than a club sport, I can also see potential for how it might do the massive competitive international sport glow-up that turned figure skating and artistic gymnastics into the superhuman feats they are today. I really really want to see what happens to the routines if that happens.
Can we be spoofy, or is this meant to be serious?
I was going to suggest the "100 Page Copy-and-Collate" championships, followed by the "1,000 pounds to the Post Office" Marathon.
Maybe a "Write, Assemble, File, and Win" NSF grant award relay after-tax?
;--》
M.
Dorm move-in, as an event with partners drawn at random from all competing nations. Points for the amount of stuff crammed in elevator, number of extension cords used, creative room arrangements, closest parking to doors, amount of pizza eaten afterwards, weirdness of pizza choice, extent of visible sweat on t-shirt.
To follow up on the cornhole championships, I've seen coverage for fishing tournaments on one of the sports channels on Dish.
QuoteTo follow up on the cornhole championships, I've seen coverage for fishing tournaments on one of the sports channels on Dish.
Yes, but fishing shows have been on TV for decades!
I would not be surprised (though I dont have that package!) to find a fishing Network (as Im sure that there already is a Golf Network in some package!)
When was the first time you saw HOURS of TV devoted to Cornhole championships? (for me, only within the last 2 months!)
I would like to see a binge-watching marathon. Points for duration, of course, but also for beverage spillage; remote control control; flatulence; chip and frozen pizza scarfing technique; neglecting responsibilities; weight gain; and number of times athletes have to hit pause to let the dogs out.
That or an Olympic YouTube FailBlog event. Medals for stupidest; most painful; worst friend prank; most overweight and unathletic middle-aged human athletic attempt at idiotic adolescent stunt; and best shot to the bollocks.
Oh! And may worst dressed at Wal-Mart medals. Wonder if anyone could sit through that one.
Also see "Future Fail-ylimpics!" (https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=y652KUaJVPA)
I'm going with the marble races that ESPN carries. Addictive must see TV.
Bari Weiss called it months ago, victimhood Olympics. And you don't even need a stadium.
In honor of swimmer Tom Daley, knitting. :-)
On M.A.S.H. they had cockroach racing
Cat herding.
Drunk essay grading: based on speed, accuracy, four shots after each qualifying round, and student evals.
[as Marlon Brando] I could of been a contender.
Sport ist Mord.
Competitive eating
For the Winter Olympics: driveway shoveling - extra points if you can fling it into a neighbors yard. Curling while ice fishing - points for sliding the rocks, catching fish, and drinking PBR while perched on a bucket. Points lost for frostbite.
For the Summer Olympics: golf with abundant wildlife hazards - extra points for dodging the angry geese, hungry ducks, and lounging alligators. Ultimate frisbee - teams formed at random based on shirt color, extra points for amazing catches, medals entirely optional as long as there is free beer.
Baseball --- the tobacco juice spitting derby
Quote from: Sun_Worshiper on August 09, 2021, 06:15:57 PM
Competitive eating
Followed by competitive imposing on the health care system.
Thesis-defending: The athlete must protect a book at all costs from a committee hurling daggers and pointed questions (and just generally hurling), using a ladle or butter knife or some other ill-suited instruments as defensive weapons. Must also confront an Infernal Examiner (whips of fire and phrases like "You shall not pass!" optional).
Tenure-wrangling: The athlete must first undergo various propitiatory rituals to appease the Ancient Ones, such as blood-letting or doing grunt work in a committee. Then, after the traditional Morituri te salutant, the athlete must face, with a wooden sword, various instances of combat against say, lions, bears or crocodiles, while possibly being required to jump through hoops on fire in between. If the athlete prevails, a committee then votes and if pleased (thumbs up) may quote the tale of Griselidis; if the committee is displeased (thumbs down) then the Cadaver Synod may be used as reference and precedent.