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"Favorite" student sentences

Started by Thursday's_Child, September 26, 2019, 08:37:56 AM

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the_geneticist

#90
Quote
lmao!

Today's gem from grading jail: "In 19th century, America faced a Hurricane Named "Katrina". Which nearly destroyed nearly all America."

I guess my US history class skipped that bit. . .
Very bold use of capital letters.
Very Important Hurricane Indeed!

apl68

Quote from: Pendragon on April 27, 2020, 10:22:01 AM
My current favorite:

"Basically, theater plays were kind of like live television or live shows of entertainment before those things were invented."

Reminiscent of the time Charlie Brown's sister Sally wrote about how ancient Greece had no television, but many philosophers.  She said that she, personally, wouldn't care to spend all evening watching a philosopher.
If in this life only we had hope of Christ, we would be the most pathetic of them all.  But now is Christ raised from the dead, the first of those who slept.  First Christ, then afterward those who belong to Christ when he comes.

bopper

Quote from: apl68 on April 27, 2020, 01:45:39 PM


Reminiscent of the time Charlie Brown's sister Sally wrote about how ancient Greece had no television, but many philosophers.  She said that she, personally, wouldn't care to spend all evening watching a philosopher.

https://www.gocomics.com/peanuts/1974/05/01

Larimar

"Communication has always been a cornerstone in conveying a message."


Yes, and in mathematics, x=x.

Diogenes

"Religion has coexisted with humans for hundreds of thousands of years..."

Bonus point for first sentence.


writingprof

Quote from: Diogenes on May 05, 2020, 08:31:58 AM
"Religion has coexisted with humans for hundreds of thousands of years..."

Bonus point for first sentence.

And for avoiding "since the beginning of time," which had to have been a temptation.

FishProf

I got one! I finally got one!

"From the dawn of time, chiropractic therapy has been seen as a hoax or a religion".

The real beauty, however, is the VERY NEXT sentence where he identifies (correctly) the year of Chiropractic's invention; 1895.
I'd rather have questions I can't answer, than answers I can't question.

Parasaurolophus

Quote from: FishProf on May 08, 2020, 11:24:47 AM
I got one! I finally got one!

"From the dawn of time, chiropractic therapy has been seen as a hoax or a religion".

The real beauty, however, is the VERY NEXT sentence where he identifies (correctly) the year of Chiropractic's invention; 1895.


=D
I know it's a genus.

FishProf

I have these gems from the same paper.

1) The human tissue is very manageable and using its thermal effects to focus high – intensity on the specific area of interest is the main source of sonoluminescence.

2) Although this is a process for the determination of such live changing evidence, the total numbers varied between if the US was effective enough to capture the area of interest or if it was differed when compared to the HIFU devices.

3) Therefore, this specific treatment can't be a definitive method of therapy as it has many limitations, and the side effects are very dangerous when in comparison to diseases that are inclusive with the US therapy.

4) It has the ability to underestimate or potentially overlooked and the machines that are available via athletic trainers or sporting events aren't as effective as larger machines

5) The claim is that Non – thermal ultrasound will enhance their cell killing of hyperthermia, due to its general manageability in relation to tissue attenuation.

6) Neither group did not have any major differences in the tumor characteristics, but also no not severe complications were drawn from the HIFU treatment.

The student is livid and insulted that I said his paper was incoherent.
I'd rather have questions I can't answer, than answers I can't question.

apl68

Quote from: FishProf on May 08, 2020, 12:02:40 PM
I have these gems from the same paper.

1) The human tissue is very manageable and using its thermal effects to focus high – intensity on the specific area of interest is the main source of sonoluminescence.

2) Although this is a process for the determination of such live changing evidence, the total numbers varied between if the US was effective enough to capture the area of interest or if it was differed when compared to the HIFU devices.

3) Therefore, this specific treatment can't be a definitive method of therapy as it has many limitations, and the side effects are very dangerous when in comparison to diseases that are inclusive with the US therapy.

4) It has the ability to underestimate or potentially overlooked and the machines that are available via athletic trainers or sporting events aren't as effective as larger machines

5) The claim is that Non – thermal ultrasound will enhance their cell killing of hyperthermia, due to its general manageability in relation to tissue attenuation.

6) Neither group did not have any major differences in the tumor characteristics, but also no not severe complications were drawn from the HIFU treatment.

The student is livid and insulted that I said his paper was incoherent.

Especially given that the topic of the paper was a critique of gender and class in the works of Charles Dickens.
If in this life only we had hope of Christ, we would be the most pathetic of them all.  But now is Christ raised from the dead, the first of those who slept.  First Christ, then afterward those who belong to Christ when he comes.

FishProf

Quote from: apl68 on May 08, 2020, 12:15:46 PM
Quote from: FishProf on May 08, 2020, 12:02:40 PM
I have these gems from the same paper.

1) The human tissue is very manageable and using its thermal effects to focus high – intensity on the specific area of interest is the main source of sonoluminescence.

2) Although this is a process for the determination of such live changing evidence, the total numbers varied between if the US was effective enough to capture the area of interest or if it was differed when compared to the HIFU devices.

3) Therefore, this specific treatment can't be a definitive method of therapy as it has many limitations, and the side effects are very dangerous when in comparison to diseases that are inclusive with the US therapy.

4) It has the ability to underestimate or potentially overlooked and the machines that are available via athletic trainers or sporting events aren't as effective as larger machines

5) The claim is that Non – thermal ultrasound will enhance their cell killing of hyperthermia, due to its general manageability in relation to tissue attenuation.

6) Neither group did not have any major differences in the tumor characteristics, but also no not severe complications were drawn from the HIFU treatment.

The student is livid and insulted that I said his paper was incoherent.

Especially given that the topic of the paper was a critique of gender and class in the works of Charles Dickens.

It might have helped if that were so.  Maybe.
I'd rather have questions I can't answer, than answers I can't question.

AmLitHist

Comp I student's C&C paper about her parents:

They are complete and udder opposites.

Aster

Quote from: FishProf on May 08, 2020, 12:02:40 PM
I have these gems from the same paper.

1) The human tissue is very manageable and using its thermal effects to focus high – intensity on the specific area of interest is the main source of sonoluminescence.

2) Although this is a process for the determination of such live changing evidence, the total numbers varied between if the US was effective enough to capture the area of interest or if it was differed when compared to the HIFU devices.

3) Therefore, this specific treatment can't be a definitive method of therapy as it has many limitations, and the side effects are very dangerous when in comparison to diseases that are inclusive with the US therapy.

4) It has the ability to underestimate or potentially overlooked and the machines that are available via athletic trainers or sporting events aren't as effective as larger machines

5) The claim is that Non – thermal ultrasound will enhance their cell killing of hyperthermia, due to its general manageability in relation to tissue attenuation.

6) Neither group did not have any major differences in the tumor characteristics, but also no not severe complications were drawn from the HIFU treatment.

The student is livid and insulted that I said his paper was incoherent.

Maybe he's upset that the money he paid for someone else to write his paper didn't work out.

FishProf

Quote from: Aster on May 11, 2020, 07:29:05 AM
Quote from: FishProf on May 08, 2020, 12:02:40 PM
I have these gems from the same paper.

1) The human tissue is very manageable and using its thermal effects to focus high – intensity on the specific area of interest is the main source of sonoluminescence....

The student is livid and insulted that I said his paper was incoherent.

Maybe he's upset that the money he paid for someone else to write his paper didn't work out.

Maybe, but his presentation and his poster were both reasonable and understandable.
I'd rather have questions I can't answer, than answers I can't question.

mamselle

Rx: he copied the poster and presentation verbatim but turned the "word salad" thesaurus generator on the later work, fearing three well-written items would arouse suspicion...

How cynical one becomes...

M.
Forsake the foolish, and live; and go in the way of understanding.

Reprove not a scorner, lest they hate thee: rebuke the wise, and they will love thee.

Give instruction to the wise, and they will be yet wiser: teach the just, and they will increase in learning.