strategies for avoiding toxic politics/gossip??

[pepsi_alum]

I'm starting a new job in a few weeks and looking for advice from forumites about how to avoid getting sucked into toxic department politics/gossip. It was an especially vexing problem at my last place due to local circumstances (isolated geographic location + troubled campus culture + lots of people with gripes = toxic fishbowl that was hard to escape from). My new school seems to have its act together comparatively speaking and is located in a much larger metropolitan area, but I also recognize that no job is ever perfect.

So what strategies do you use to avoid getting sucked into local toxicity? I'm hopeful that being in a larger city means that I'll have more things outside of work to keep me mentally occupied. I also recognize in retrospect that I didn't set enough to set personal boundaries with gossipers early on, which led to me hearing about a lot of drama that I didn't need to know but couldn't unheear once I did. But I'd welcome other ideas and tips.

[nescafe]

I also want to see what others say here, because I have ended up in this situation also. But one thing I have learned is to be totally and absolutely boring when confronted with gossip, usually by resisting the urge to commiserate with whoever the speaker is.

People gossip and gripe to serve a social purpose. The shared experience of being "in on it" creates a social bond. Not playing the role of the interested listener can often be enough to ensure the gossiper/griper doesn't come back your way.

[mamselle]

Sometimes it works to look mildly puzzled, as if it's unclear why someone would think or say those things about someone else, especially if you can do so while looking up from or appearing to have been pulled away something that just had your full attention (and was more positively engrossing).

A "Hunh?" or, "no, hadn't heard that," combined with a concerned look at some time-telling device, and an "Oh, sorry, have to scoot! Good to talk, hope your day goes well!" may help get you out of the range of the joyful bearer of bad news, and add a tiny bit of shine to your, "No, s/he won't hear anything bad of anyone" reputation.

Or else they'll think you're a little dim, and wouldn't understand all the juicy details, anyway.

If they don't take that hint, and you can think of some innocuous good the other person has done--or better still, shift the topic to some nice award the school has won, or some good news coverage you've just seen, you send the message that your radar is tuned to a positive channel and the reception on the negative air waves isn't good enough to bother with.

Sometimes it requires several applications of this treatment before the bad-news fleas leave your ears alone, though...

[emprof]

Nod, smile, do not respond. Apologetically sidle away to an urgent errand, or "oh, I think I see a student at my door. My office hours just started - see you later?" If pressed, "really? wow." or "I hadn't realized that." If asked for a direct comment, play dumb/amazed, then change the subject. EVERYBODY loves being asked for advice and treated like a mentor, it's flattering. So, to get out of an awkward situation looking good, change the subject by asking them for something small, tips on something they know lots about, like dealing with cellphone use in a big lecture hall.

Keep your head down at department meetings. Find a senior mentor OUTSIDE the department that can be trusted.

[glowdart]

I found it useful to listen to the non-gossipy gossip without engaging in sharing information that isn't mine to share. You learn things, including about who not to trust with information. But there's a difference between hearing about why the curriculum is whack and hearing that your colleague is having an affair with the new guy at student affairs.

I'd also pay attention to who is telling you what and when. There will be that person who starts actively trying to turn you against certain people in the department, the person who tries wheedling their way into your life to manipulate you later, and the people who try to warn you about particular quirks of particular colleagues in a balanced way because they want you to be protected but don't want to be the first person in this too long sentence.

If your contemporaries pull you aside with warnings and translations, I'd listen with a grain of salt and observe to see what you see. If your senior colleagues start working you, walk away slowly until you've been there long enough to see what it really happening. Look at who actually talks to everyone in the department reciprocally and collegially, and who doesn't. That will tell you a lot.

I make it a point to let my new colleagues come to me with questions about what they see and hear — they're smart people and can see it for themselves. But if they ask about toxic behaviors, I won't pretend what they are seeing or experiencing isn't happening. I also work behind the scenes to protect new faculty from our known problems without ever publicly announcing that I'm doing it or that it needs to be done. Hopefully your new colleagues will do the same.

[the_geneticist]

I found it useful to listen to the non-gossipy gossip without engaging in sharing information that isn't mine to share. You learn things, including about who not to trust with information. But there's a difference between hearing about why the curriculum is whack and hearing that your colleague is having an affair with the new guy at student affairs.

I'd also pay attention to who is telling you what and when. There will be that person who starts actively trying to turn you against certain people in the department, the person who tries wheedling their way into your life to manipulate you later, and the people who try to warn you about particular quirks of particular colleagues in a balanced way because they want you to be protected but don't want to be the first person in this too long sentence.

If your contemporaries pull you aside with warnings and translations, I'd listen with a grain of salt and observe to see what you see. If your senior colleagues start working you, walk away slowly until you've been there long enough to see what it really happening. Look at who actually talks to everyone in the department reciprocally and collegially, and who doesn't. That will tell you a lot.

I make it a point to let my new colleagues come to me with questions about what they see and hear — they're smart people and can see it for themselves. But if they ask about toxic behaviors, I won't pretend what they are seeing or experiencing isn't happening. I also work behind the scenes to protect new faculty from our known problems without ever publicly announcing that I'm doing it or that it needs to be done. Hopefully your new colleagues will do the same.

Both of these are very good points to keep in mind.  I accidentally learned who in the staff is a terrible, inappropriate over-sharer of information when one of my graduate TAs was in a bit of a crisis. 
Know who you shouldn't vent to unless you want everyone to know about your business.

[miss jane marple]

In my experience, "gossip" can be in at least three different categories: useful, toxic, and boring waste of time. Useful gossip is when you find out that Something Important is going to happen, such as that your Dean has just decided to retire. Toxic gossip is hard to get away from, because often it masquerades as useful gossip. A question to ask yourself in such a situation is, who benefits if I and other people believe this story? What will change in our behavior? Are we being manipulated? I concur with all the advice to be non-committal and bland in your response and keep the conversation brief. You might even throw in some reflective listening, such as "that must have been very frustrating for you" or "how disappointing" focusing not on the story itself but the gossiper's feelings.

Yes indeed to discovering who shouldn't be privy to ANY kind of sensitive information. Once upon a time I was relatively new in a position when Nice Colleague became our department chair and the Old Chair was moved up to a Dean-level administrative role. One afternoon when only Old Chair and I were in the department, they sat down in my office and proceeded to impart several bits of personal information about other colleagues that should not have been shared with me, ending up with "Nice Colleague isn't as smart as [they] think [they are]." That cured me of ever telling Old Chair anything I didn't want everyone to know. Years later, Old Chair is still sharing inappropriately, and some of it has turned out to be useful (or at least interesting) gossip.

[larryc]

Miss Marple makes the excellent point that there is gossip and there is gossip.

Often the first person to come into your office to "share" is the most alienated member of the department, looking for allies in a toxic crusade. Change the topic, offer no opinion, suddenly realize that you have an appointment at the library.

[mahagonny]

At the university where we work, the faculty who serve their term as chair, or are in line to (not down to the last body, but a core of them) have a track record of making overly stringent rules, for example, about scheduling of classes, making up days you were sick, and such, and then trying to pick off the adjuncts  who get behind the eight ball in some way. They also use complaints from low performing students that way. The union fights it. They keep lighting fires and we have to spend time and energy putting them out. They never did this before we had a union. The administration hates the union and the faculty, or a significant number of the permanent faculty, fall in line, we suspect, to stay in their good graces. So we have a toxic environment that comes not from colleagues, but from supervisors. The concern is more that you are becoming the subject of a toxic discussion. My approach is, come to work, eat lunch alone, leave promptly, greet people with a smile, keep walking.
I don't suppose this helps you, but it may help some readers who are reading the thread who may have a situation like mine.

[pepsi_alum]

I appreciate everyone who chimed in with advice. Things seem to be going well at my new job so far. It's only a week in, but so far, I haven't seen any major red flags.