the "things you wish you could say" thread

[archaeo42]

No, sister-in-law, the extended debate you initiated on "what I am" in relation to your toddler since I'm not a blood relative, and whether "aunt-in-law" is the right term to differentiate me from your toddler's "proper" uncles, didn't make me feel excluded. After all, I've known you since you became a teenager! <cheeks aching from smiling>

I'm baffled by this. An aunt is a relation through blood or marriage. That is a bizarre distinction to make (says the anthropologist).

I find it weird too. As best as I can understand, it's not really about any supposed distinction. My sister-in-law likes to start these sorts of discussions/make such remarks to ensure that I am publicly reminded of the (lowly) place in the family pecking order that she thinks I deserve. I do my best to grin and bear it, so that Mr. Porcupine doesn't have to referee any arguments, which would make him exceedingly unhappy.

Ooof. Family dynamics are so much fun.

[Thursday's_Child]

Dear Car Dealership:

Thank you for the nice letter telling me that you would like to help me upgrade my ride to (something that sounds spiffy and fishy at that same time).

Your calculations are interesting to me:  first, you value my current vehicle at about 60% of what the state does (according to my registration information); second, you are confident that I will save $600 on fuel costs over the next five years with this upgrade; third, you are sure that the minimum $21,000 I'll have to spend will be completely worthwhile since, after all, new vehicles have WARRANTIES!

I do have an idea about how you came to perceive me as a potential cash-cow.  I do not have any idea how you came to think me completely stupid.

Yours sincerely,

Dr. T. Child

[fishbrains]

Because you are an a$$hole . . . to everyone . . . all the damn time. That's why.

[mamselle]

One presumes the above note by fishbrains is not related to the antepenultimate note bu Thursday's Child....correct?

;--}

M.

[Thursday's_Child]

I certainly presume so - without the slightest hesitation, in fact, because the post does not accurately describe me.

[mamselle]

I thought not.

M.

[fishbrains]

One presumes the above note by fishbrains is not related to the antepenultimate note bu Thursday's Child....correct?

;--}

M.

Not at all. I'm sorry if my post sounded that way.

[mamselle]

It was an interesting juxtaposition.

Glad to know that's all it was....

;--]

M.

[ergative]

Colleagues, I appreciate that all these emails are an indication that this particular administrative role that I've made my own will revert to me after my research leave is done. I do, I truly do appreciate it. But, colleagues, I'm on research leave. My replacement can take care of it! I don't care! It's her job! Leave me out of it! Don't send me the emails!

[mamselle]

There.

That room's clean...

M.

[Juvenal]

Cool, dry weather is just around the corner.

[sprout]

There.

That room's clean...

M.

*laughing*  I so wish I could say that!

[fishbrains]

Hey Alpha Wolfcub and Gynosaurus Rex: Neither one of you are "winning." And you two toxic a-holes aren't going to have a seat at the table much longer if you both don't turn the attitudes down a couple of notches. Maybe consider turning all those insecurities into something a little more positive.

[FishProf]

You saw the Job Posting online, which specified that you apply ONLINE, and you thought it best to email me you CV to see if I am interested? 

No, I'm not interested, now.

[San Joaquin]

How about now?

If I add sprinkles???

<runs laughing demonically>