Humor and Wisdom in a time of Plague...(w/apologies to D. Defoe)

[mamselle]

Seen on my Twitter feed: (by lawyer Derek Muller):

"Academic friends:

  Isaac Newton discovered calculus while in quarantine.

  William Shakespeare wrote "King Lear" while in quarantine.

  You will learn how to unmute your computer's microphone during a Zoom meeting while in quarantine."

What are you seeing?

M.

[apl68]

Well, trying to find simple cleaning supplies for work (I'm good at home) is looking like a scavenger hunt.  Today I went to five places seeking sanitation supplies.  I found bleach at one place, facial tissues at another, cleaning gloves for the circulation staff at a third, and a tiny canister of sanitary wipes at a fourth.  And nothing at all useful at a fifth.  We'll probably be bleaching a lot in the near future.

It was almost fun, in a weird sort of way.

[mamselle]

Yes. As a response to my (usually in-their-homes, private) music students, I'm working out various approaches to lessons.

Kids like Zoom with real-time commentary.

Adults are opting towards making tapes on their phones or Audacity and sending those to me for comments.

One family (I knew this would happen) went ahead on a cruise last week--and seem a bit surprised that they've been asked to be in quarantine at home for the next two weeks, now they've returned. (We'll be Zoom-ing, for sure).

My sister, a smaller-ish-town librarian, is staying open (and says people should RELAX...) and telling me how much her patrons are saying they appreciate her standing up to the fear-mongers (I'm trying to figure out how to respond to this judiciously....without yelling. I realize where her influences are coming from...)

And the sub-group of my larger May conference---that has still not cancelled (interestingly, in the same state where my sister's library is)--has written to say that they can't encourage anyone to attend in good faith, and are working on alternatives for those of us who've had papers accepted into their sections of the conference.

So, it's like, all over the board.

Weird, worrisome, wild...people, being people, are just...unfathomable sometimes!

M.

[backatit]

Why can't I find distilled water for my cpap machine? Are people...drinking it? Why?

[mamselle]

Hunh. What's up with that??

They're worried their steam irons will run out of steam, or...??

M.

[Nightshade]

In my hometown, a majority believe the Coronavirus has been overblown or created by the "Deep State". Now they are running out of things like hand sanitizer. Perhaps the majority is rethinking its position?

Also, for a humorous aside, all should read story 3 of Day 9 of the Decameron...."How Calandrino's friends, Bruno, Buffalmacco, and Nello, persuade him that he is pregnant, and how everyone ends up feeling pleased—except his wife". Such a wonderful reread right now, in between grading and moving courses online (and waiting on job prospects).

I think we should write our own short stories and then edit them into a volume? It could be epic. Message me if interested.

[mamselle]

What a great idea!!!

Let me ponder that....

And, yes, I just wrote to tell my sister, who's a librarian in a small midwestern city, that a conference I was due to go to in their state is on the brink of being cancelled by governors' orders and that instead of saying "everyone just needs to CHILL," she might want to think about how to enhance their library online resources and get ready because I think they're going to issue a full-close order once they do start recognizing the reality of the situation.

I did a survey of the dance references in the Decameron once. Maybe I'll...Hmmmm....

M.

[backatit]

Hunh. What's up with that??

They're worried their steam irons will run out of steam, or...??

M.

Not the right thread LOL, so maybe unintentionally funny, but yeah, it's weird!

[Nightshade]

So, in keeping with the humor of this time....why toilet paper? A serious question on my end. Is it the only reason why people generally have to go to the grocery store?

[mamselle]

Maybe they're making papier-mache ducks with it or something?

;--}

M.

[ergative]

So, in keeping with the humor of this time....why toilet paper? A serious question on my end. Is it the only reason why people generally have to go to the grocery store?

1. Because running out sucks, and if you have to quarantine yourself for two weeks you might run out.
2. Because it never goes bad.
3. Because you'll use it anyway, even if you never have to quarantine (unlike that flat bed of dried beans)
4. Because it's running low.

I think people are perhaps a little more frantic about point 4 than they need to be, but points 1-3 are very rational reasons to stock up.

[apl68]

I've seen it said elsewhere that if you need to buy 144 rolls of TP to prepare for a 14-day quarantine, you should probably already have gone to see the doctor a long time ago.

[ergative]

I've seen it said elsewhere that if you need to buy 144 rolls of TP to prepare for a 14-day quarantine, you should probably already have gone to see the doctor a long time ago.

144 is a lot, but imagine a family of 6, each of whom gets it in turn. Those weeks are going to add up, and six people use a lot of TP. Worst case scenario: each person gets it just as the 14 days from the previous person end. That's 12 weeks of quarantine*. Can six people use 12 rolls of toilet paper in a week? I can easily imagine going through two in a week on my own, or even more if they're the super-cheap 1-ply rolls. So by that calculus 144 rolls sounds just about right.

*Should recovered people be quarantined if someone else in their family has an active case? They might not be active vectors, but presumably they can still spread it on their hands and wallets and clothes and so on.

[Catherder]

Drove into my local town this AM. On the right hand side of the main street  there is a fundamentalist church, which like many churches and businesses has scripted its sign (this one is neon) to offer encouraging words. So this church sign reads:

"Be kind. Be patient. In Jesus we have refuse"

Oops!

[Anselm]

Chuck Norris has tested positive for Covid-19.

The virus is now in quarantine for 14 days.