Humor and Wisdom in a time of Plague...(w/apologies to D. Defoe)

[mamselle]

If everyone who stashed away TP put one roll back we could probably get through.

M.

[Anselm]

Society is tearing apart at the seams.

https://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-8136527/Couple-furious-told-theyre-not-allowed-buy-TWENTY-THREE-cases-Mountain-Dew.html

[FishProf]

Well, trying to find simple cleaning supplies for work (I'm good at home) is looking like a scavenger hunt.  Today I went to five places seeking sanitation supplies.  I found bleach at one place, facial tissues at another, cleaning gloves for the circulation staff at a third, and a tiny canister of sanitary wipes at a fourth.  And nothing at all useful at a fifth.  We'll probably be bleaching a lot in the near future.

It was almost fun, in a weird sort of way.

Pool Supplies.  Powdered sodium hypochlorite is available in my area.

[mamselle]

Because of my colonial gravestone work, I'm on several genealogical sites.

I occasionally use a moniker to put some distance between my identity there and my work.

At one point I was using an older moniker from the old forum, which I'd forgotten about, as a sign-on.

The family history folks must have a lot of time on their hands, now, because they just informed me that they can tell a lot about me from this (totally made-up) name, and they propose to show me my family tree for a small fee.

I'm curious what they think they've found, but have no intention of paying them to find out!

M.

[paultuttle]

Well, trying to find simple cleaning supplies for work (I'm good at home) is looking like a scavenger hunt.  Today I went to five places seeking sanitation supplies.  I found bleach at one place, facial tissues at another, cleaning gloves for the circulation staff at a third, and a tiny canister of sanitary wipes at a fourth.  And nothing at all useful at a fifth.  We'll probably be bleaching a lot in the near future.

It was almost fun, in a weird sort of way.

Pool Supplies.  Powdered sodium hypochlorite is available in my area.

Huh! Good to remember. Thanks!

[Thursday's_Child]

In case you need cheering up (or ideas...)

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=e41YVSOQQ1I
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3KTJBaK3iQk

[apl68]

When I last spoke to my mother yesterday she told me "Be sure not to expose yourself."  Then she realized what that sounded like...

[Anselm]

https://nypost.com/video/new-yorker-singing-out-window-told-to-shut-the-f-up/

New York, the heart of fashion and high society, is keeping it classy in these tough times.

[Cheerful]

Hello

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=M5azNpTwVk8

[apl68]

So, one of our staff member's church is still holding small meetings, with people maintaining social distance around the church sanctuary.  She and her husband had taken their seat.  Then a large, sweaty man sat directly behind them.  Her husband turned to him and said "Do you got coronavirus?"  He got the message.

[Cheerful]

From same guy who did the viral Hello (from the Inside) Adele parody -- when you need a good laugh.

This one is heartwarming, not humorous.  Thank U Frontline.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xGKFVMgjrPc

[Nightshade]

I had just been wondering whether bidet sales have skyrocketed in the U.S. given the TP shortage. This from the NYT coronavirus updates newsletter that lands in my inbox each day:


We're sharing some of your dispatches from around the globe about life in the time of coronavirus.

Today, we have Chanel Bishton from Vallejo, Calif., with an ode to the bidet.

Visitors mocked me
My teenage son scoffed —
When I installed
a European style bidet —
In our bathroom.
Now I am the Envy
Of apparently the world
It seems
No toilet paper in sight
But clean rumps here —
No less —
Warm water sprayed
Blow-dried
With a fresh towel to finish
If still damp
For this I am very grateful.

[apl68]

Families with children in some places, including our town, have turned to "bear hunting."  Participants put stuffed bears and such in their windows or out in their yards, then walk or drive around the neighborhood trying to spot other bears.  It gets kids out of the house while maintaining social distance.

[mamselle]

I saw that. I wish I had a window that would hold a bear (I have several) that could be seen from the sidewalk!

(Mine's blocked by an overgrown thicket of all kinds of stuff that my landlord grows and doesn't thin out....!)

M.

[Economizer]

Maybe they're making papier-mache ducks with it or something?

;--}

M.

In a cutting edge interview on NPR a couple of days ago, a large New England toilet paper manufacturing co. CEO was to give his views on the hoarding
of such. I missed it. Did anyone here catch it? Perhaps it should be rebroadcast? Expiring minds need to know!