The Mental Health Thread

[mahagonny]

SCR, I don't know if I've mentioned this already, but I find kratom to be a safe mood elevator. Only downside is occasional dry mouth and strange dreams. I know there's one naysayer on the subject of kratom, but I've been using it two years. Not addicted. I don't go crazy with it. Just enough of a dose to be noticeable. Enhances energy too.

[smallcleanrat]

SCR, I don't know if I've mentioned this already, but I find kratom to be a safe mood elevator. Only downside is occasional dry mouth and strange dreams. I know there's one naysayer on the subject of kratom, but I've been using it two years. Not addicted. I don't go crazy with it. Just enough of a dose to be noticeable. Enhances energy too.

Thanks for the info. I hadn't heard of this one before.

I've been having mixed success with the ketamine, so I'm focusing on that for now. But I've got a little list of "maybe/someday" things to try in case current treatments stop working.

I'm not sure why, but lately I've been having some unusually intricate dreams (complex plots and settings). I sometimes try to fall back asleep because I want to get to the end of the story. I don't like the sense of incompleteness that comes after waking without a resolution. It's hard to recapture the details upon awakening.

I'm wondering if prolonged periods of poor sleep/lack of REM sleep can lead to intensive dream rebounds like this.

[Charlotte]

I'm not sure why, but lately I've been having some unusually intricate dreams (complex plots and settings). I sometimes try to fall back asleep because I want to get to the end of the story. I don't like the sense of incompleteness that comes after waking without a resolution. It's hard to recapture the details upon awakening.

I'm wondering if prolonged periods of poor sleep/lack of REM sleep can lead to intensive dream rebounds like this.

I had very vivid and intricate dreams when I was on sertraline. It was like having a movie marathon every night. Sometimes they were interesting and sometimes they were terrifying. I'm not sure the cause of that but you may want to avoid horror movies/books because they might sneak into your nightly story!

[Hegemony]

I would advise caution about kratom. Here is some info from the Mayo Clinic:

Although people who take kratom believe in its value, researchers who have studied kratom think its side effects and safety problems more than offset any potential benefits. Poison control centers in the United States received about 1,800 reports involving use of kratom from 2011 through 2017, including reports of death. About half of these exposures resulted in serious negative outcomes such as seizures and high blood pressure.

https://www.mayoclinic.org/healthy-lifestyle/consumer-health/in-depth/kratom/art-20402171

[mahagonny]

I would advise caution about kratom. Here is some info from the Mayo Clinic:

Although people who take kratom believe in its value, researchers who have studied kratom think its side effects and safety problems more than offset any potential benefits. Poison control centers in the United States received about 1,800 reports involving use of kratom from 2011 through 2017, including reports of death. About half of these exposures resulted in serious negative outcomes such as seizures and high blood pressure.

https://www.mayoclinic.org/healthy-lifestyle/consumer-health/in-depth/kratom/art-20402171

That's exactly what I was recommending. Cautious, smaller dose use up to a couple times a day. When you start to see tolerance and diminishing effects, back off or stop. If one chooses to use. I have not experienced increased tolerance. My blood pressure is 120/80. Exercise and not being overweight (well, only 5 lbs) help.

I asked the forum about ketamine sometime ago and got a load of scare stories. I haven't tried it, but that's not the reason.

Prytania2 was against SSRI's and gave reasons. She recommended benzodiazepine which I didn't care for.

A good rule of thumb is stick to what are considered smallish dose.

The kratom I buy is a powder. It is consistent and easily measured, not like many street drugs. It doesn't come with a lot of warnings like FDA approved prescription drugs. It tastes horrible and you would never want to consume a lot of it. It's the driest substance I have ever encountered. Mix a little with some fruity yogurt.

[mahagonny]

con't

from The Mayo Clinic webpage:

"Kratom also affects the mind and nervous system:

Dizziness
Drowsiness
Hallucinations and delusion
Depression and delusion
Breathing suppression
Seizure, coma and death"

I find this very vague. What dose? We might note that benadryl causes hallucinations and give the example of people who take ten or twenty times the maximum dose recommended for either sleep or antihistamine effects. They want hallucinations. Whereas, being prone to allergies, I have used diphenhydramine (benadryl) at a dose of no more than 50 mg (more often 25 or 12.5) and never experienced any of the effects named above other than drowsiness. Not even as a child.

[Hegemony]

I think the issue is that since kratom is unregulated, you don't know what dose you're getting. There are different strains, which have different potencies. The method of ingestion also differs, so that capsules will be different from tablets will be different from tinctures. And you are also relying on the individual companies to report their contents accurately, which is not always the case in an unregulated market, and indeed not always the case in a regulated one. According to Healthline, "the production of kratom hasn't been regulated. The FDA doesn't monitor the safety or purity of herbs. There are no established standards for safely producing this drug." So it depends on your assessment of risk and your propensity for risk-taking.

[mahagonny]

No offense taken. I know that in some ways I am less risk averse that I used to be. Reasons: Our child is grown and decently successful and grounded, so I don't feel the obligation of people depending on me in the same way. Also, when you have experienced major depression as I have, you get used to giving up on solutions. Your'e now looking for productive tradeoff's. SSRI's, nortryptiline, doxepin, wellbutrin, etc. all have bothersome side effects, and some can have lethal paradoxical effect (thinking more about suicide, for example: this is why your psychiatrist needs to watch you like a hawk during the first six weeks of treatment) but they are opted for, and for good reason. Untreated major depression can produce suicide. You can't get any riskier than that. People have given up sex to avoid major depression. It's sad in a way, but it can be worth it.
In some ways I am less risk averse. I no longer take LSD as I did at age 16. Less risk averse is not the same as reckless. Different thought processes. I bet you agree.
I believe kratom being separated by strain is helpful. The smoke shop where I buy has a printout that shows the accents: some give you more energy, some more euphoria, some more pain relief. The stuff has a long history of use. Granted, the salesman didn't graduate from a college of pharmacy, but he's on your side and has a lot of customers that he talks to.
ETA: A friend of mine is an herbalist. She recommends microdosing with psilocybin mushrooms. She demonstrates how to get a very small dose. Ground, mixed with honey. You don't have a spoonful. You mix it up, empty the spoon, the lick it. She's not into getting high. I tried it but it didn't so much for me.

[Charlotte]

Grad school isn't making me unhappy; being too shut down to take advantage of what grad school has to offer is what's making me unhappy. I know what I *want* to do; but I know longer know what I *can* do in the future. So much depends on how much function I can recover.

Smallcleanrat, I was just thinking of you today and hope you are doing better.

[smallcleanrat]

Grad school isn't making me unhappy; being too shut down to take advantage of what grad school has to offer is what's making me unhappy. I know what I *want* to do; but I know longer know what I *can* do in the future. So much depends on how much function I can recover.

Smallcleanrat, I was just thinking of you today and hope you are doing better.

Thank you, Charlotte!

I'm in a sort of mental health support dry spell. Psychiatrist is away for several weeks and contact with therapist is spotty. Had a bad meds reaction a few weeks ago (lost consciousness, collapsed, paramedics were called), so still trying to get the right meds balance.

Also waiting to start physical therapy in the fall (closest available appointment), but limping and in pain in the meantime.

Feeling a bit abandoned by my healthcare system.

Currently looking into getting neuropsych testing to be screened for ADHD and/or ASD. My therapist seems convinced I have ADHD based on the issues I'm having now and things I had issues with as a kid. I have been reading that issues like ADHD and/or ASD can contribute to feelings of fatigue and mental fog (especially pre-diagnosis/support/treatment) due to the energy that goes into coping with symptoms on top of the energy required for day-to-day life.

I've been through multiple types of treatment for depression with only partial improvement. Maybe something else is going on here?

Wait-list for the testing center I called is 1 year or more, no insurance accepted (so out of pocket costs can be over $1000). Called another place that specifically screens for ADHD; they said they might be able to get me in about six months from now, but I would have to convince a doctor to give me a referral.

Haven't even looked into ASD screening yet.

The first place does comprehensive testing (over several days), and they don't seem to require a referral. But it is a longer wait and more expensive. On the other hand, is it worth it if it can give me clearer answers?

Anyone have experience seeking out testing of this sort as an adult?

[mamselle]

I don't have experience with the ADHD/ASD testing issues you ask about, but I'm glad to see your posts, and send good thoughts and hopes for clarity very soon.

Keep at it. You'll get there.

M.

[Puget]

Grad school isn't making me unhappy; being too shut down to take advantage of what grad school has to offer is what's making me unhappy. I know what I *want* to do; but I know longer know what I *can* do in the future. So much depends on how much function I can recover.

Smallcleanrat, I was just thinking of you today and hope you are doing better.

Thank you, Charlotte!

I'm in a sort of mental health support dry spell. Psychiatrist is away for several weeks and contact with therapist is spotty. Had a bad meds reaction a few weeks ago (lost consciousness, collapsed, paramedics were called), so still trying to get the right meds balance.

Also waiting to start physical therapy in the fall (closest available appointment), but limping and in pain in the meantime.

Feeling a bit abandoned by my healthcare system.

Currently looking into getting neuropsych testing to be screened for ADHD and/or ASD. My therapist seems convinced I have ADHD based on the issues I'm having now and things I had issues with as a kid. I have been reading that issues like ADHD and/or ASD can contribute to feelings of fatigue and mental fog (especially pre-diagnosis/support/treatment) due to the energy that goes into coping with symptoms on top of the energy required for day-to-day life.

I've been through multiple types of treatment for depression with only partial improvement. Maybe something else is going on here?

Wait-list for the testing center I called is 1 year or more, no insurance accepted (so out of pocket costs can be over $1000). Called another place that specifically screens for ADHD; they said they might be able to get me in about six months from now, but I would have to convince a doctor to give me a referral.

Haven't even looked into ASD screening yet.

The first place does comprehensive testing (over several days), and they don't seem to require a referral. But it is a longer wait and more expensive. On the other hand, is it worth it if it can give me clearer answers?

Anyone have experience seeking out testing of this sort as an adult?

Sorry you're having such a hard time getting an assessment appointment! First thing I'd try, since your a grad student, is to contact your university's student accessibility services-- if nothing else, they will have a list of places they refer students for assessment. Also, if your or a neighboring university has a clinical psych PhD program, look into whether their teaching clinic does assessments -- if they have a neuropsych track they likely offer assessments at a much reduced price compared to commercial clinics. You can also search for a neuropsychologist in private practice in your area--these kinds of assessments are their bread and butter,  it doesn't have to be a whole clinic that specializes in that.

I know several people who have gotten ADHD diagnoses as adults, and both medication and compensatory strategies have made a big difference from them. Also, depression and ADHD frequently co-occur (as do depression and ASD, and ASD and ADHD).

[little bongo]

Increased daily buspirone from 20 mg to 30 mg. We'll see if that does anything one way or the other.

[apl68]

I've been doing without antidepressants for several months now.  I still feel down off and on, but not crushingly low.  And I no longer have the excessive sleeping and half-alive feeling due to side effects.

[mamselle]

Good for you.

M.