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Share your hypochondria here

Started by Thursday's_Child, June 09, 2019, 06:39:44 AM

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ciao_yall

Quote from: irhack on June 26, 2019, 06:39:45 AM
IRgirl visited a friend last week who, it turns out, had head lice. My scalp has been itchy ever since.

Now I have it just from reading your post.

Thursday's_Child

Quote from: ciao_yall on June 28, 2019, 08:02:44 AM
Quote from: irhack on June 26, 2019, 06:39:45 AM
IRgirl visited a friend last week who, it turns out, had head lice. My scalp has been itchy ever since.

Now I have it just from reading your post.
Are you sure it isn't seed ticks?  You know - the really tiny ones that just hatched and, thus, are all close together so you get a whole bunch at once?

Removing them individually is really tedious, but I don't know if it's possible to cause them to suffocate by slathering yourself completely with Noxzematm or Vaselinetm.  Maybe it's better to get a snorkel and stay under water for about five hours.

ciao_yall

Quote from: Thursday's_Child on June 30, 2019, 09:48:08 AM
Quote from: ciao_yall on June 28, 2019, 08:02:44 AM
Quote from: irhack on June 26, 2019, 06:39:45 AM
IRgirl visited a friend last week who, it turns out, had head lice. My scalp has been itchy ever since.

Now I have it just from reading your post.
Are you sure it isn't seed ticks?  You know - the really tiny ones that just hatched and, thus, are all close together so you get a whole bunch at once?

Removing them individually is really tedious, but I don't know if it's possible to cause them to suffocate by slathering yourself completely with Noxzematm or Vaselinetm.  Maybe it's better to get a snorkel and stay under water for about five hours.

(Skipping off to the bathroom now with a big tub o' Vaseline)

polly_mer

I probably need to have a foot amputated.  It could be having stubbed a toe yesterday and then dropping the fan on it today, but I'm sure it's gangrene and just a matter of time before the foot must be lopped off.
Quote from: hmaria1609 on June 27, 2019, 07:07:43 PM
Do whatever you want--I'm just the background dancer in your show!

irhack

Polly_mer, sorry about your foot. At least you have another one, right?

I'm going to the doctor today because I've had this rash for six weeks. It's not really bothering me, it's not getting worse, but it's not getting better. I'm assuming it's a rare, hypervirulent cancer.

And I also feel vaguely nauseous today which I'm attributing to eating watermelon cut with a knife that was used the previous day to cut raw chicken. (And yes, washed after, but probably not thoroughly enough.)

Between the cancer and the salmonella, I hope I have time to say goodbye to my loved ones.

spork

My wife let a watermelon sit on a piece of dining room furniture for a few days. She then tried to pick it up to move it to the kitchen island and it burst like a rotten corpse. I'm pretty sure that the goo that spewed all over the wall, floor, and rug is ideal for culturing pathogenic organisms. I took the rug outside and attempted to wash it, but it still smells weird despite sitting in the sun on a 95 degree day.
It's terrible writing, used to obfuscate the fact that the authors actually have nothing to say.

irhack

Spork, I had a similar experience once. The watermelon looked normal but when touched turned out to be a shell of goo. Really makes one wonder about watermelons.

the_geneticist

Quote from: irhack on July 23, 2019, 05:44:29 AM
Spork, I had a similar experience once. The watermelon looked normal but when touched turned out to be a shell of goo. Really makes one wonder about watermelons.

I have an early childhood memory of my great uncle cutting into a watermelon and it exploded!  The smell was horrible even after he hosed off the deck.
The goo is most likely a soup of all sorts of bacteria and fungi.  Do you have a power washer?

Thursday's_Child

I am NEVER buying a whole watermelon again!

quasihumanist

Can we use this thread for car hypochodria?

I took my car in for an oil change and now the engine seems a little louder than before.  They probably forgot to put the oil back in, so the next time I get in and drive, the car will blow up.  I hope they'll find enough bits of me to bury.

the_geneticist

The bottom of my foot is slightly itchy.  I'm sure it's a horrible, flesh eating infection that will leave me with a stump for a leg.  No way it's just dry skin or a bit of grit in my shoe.

drbrt

My ankle hurts a little when I flex it. Probably ruptured a tendon.

mamselle

Quote from: quasihumanist on July 26, 2019, 11:26:59 AM
Can we use this thread for car hypochodria?

I took my car in for an oil change and now the engine seems a little louder than before.  They probably forgot to put the oil back in, so the next time I get in and drive, the car will blow up.  I hope they'll find enough bits of me to bury.

Make sure they bled the brake line, too.

M.
Forsake the foolish, and live; and go in the way of understanding.

Reprove not a scorner, lest they hate thee: rebuke the wise, and they will love thee.

Give instruction to the wise, and they will be yet wiser: teach the just, and they will increase in learning.

clean

I just wrapped up 2 online, seven week long classes. I spent the last week grading, grading, grading.  Last Tuesday, or maybe it was Thursday, I sat in my chair grading for most of the day. When I got up my calf hurt. It hurt for 2 days!  Now, I am seriously out of breath even walking from the parking garage to the building with my office. It is only about 100 yards or so, and by the time I got to the elevator (no way I could take the stairs!) i was worried I was going to pass out!  I had a meeting on Monday across campus and I was thinking while on the way that i might have to sit down!

My hypochondria is that I have developed a pulminary embolism (which I can not spell).  I may simply be at the starting stages of bronchitis or something like that.  But that is my current worry.

On the positive side, I have an appointment with my ENT for my annual allergy check up to see how much longer Ill be taking shots.  Ill see what he has to say about it... whether he wants to refer me to another specialist or send me back to my regular doctor first. 

It's hell getting old. I dont think I m ready for this... and no one survives getting old - and another birthday looms!
"The Emperor is not as forgiving as I am"  Darth Vader

mamselle

Quote from: the_geneticist on July 26, 2019, 11:57:31 AM
The bottom of my foot is slightly itchy.  I'm sure it's a horrible, flesh eating infection that will leave me with a stump for a leg.  No way it's just dry skin or a bit of grit in my shoe.

Maybe athlete's foot?

M.
Forsake the foolish, and live; and go in the way of understanding.

Reprove not a scorner, lest they hate thee: rebuke the wise, and they will love thee.

Give instruction to the wise, and they will be yet wiser: teach the just, and they will increase in learning.