Favorite student emails

[Langue_doc]

Student is shocked, I say, shocked that I wouldn't let him participate when he arrived 20 minutes late for lab. 

He tried arguing with the TA, TA sent SUS to me, I said he was too late to participate & to email me.

Hello, I am the guy that you didn't let in the lab today. Is it possible that you can send me the make up online, thanks.
[Super Upset Student]

At least he said thanks at the end. 

Was it you who had a TA that would have allowed Stu to participate? Pardon the syntax--it's been a long day.

[apl68]

Student is shocked, I say, shocked that I wouldn't let him participate when he arrived 20 minutes late for lab. 

He tried arguing with the TA, TA sent SUS to me, I said he was too late to participate & to email me.

Hello, I am the guy that you didn't let in the lab today. Is it possible that you can send me the make up online, thanks.
[Super Upset Student]

At least he said thanks at the end. 

Reminds me a bit of a certain spouse of mine who was in the habit of giving me and other adults orders, then adding "please" as an obvious afterthought.

[FishProf]

Who's ready for a game of spot the question?

"Good morning FISHPROF! How are you! I hope you had a nice long weekend!

I am sorry to bother you, but I have a question regarding the gradebook.

This past week/weekend I have already completed 15 quizzes/assignments. The total average of those is 90.6%.

I've read on your announcements that there might be a glitch on Blackboard:

  "UPDATE: There was a (IMO stupid) default setting in the gradebook. I have corrected the one I am aware of, but there may be others."

I am planning on completing 15 per week/weekend which would be sufficient for the total number of assignments before the final exam.

I am working hard in order to finish strong with my average 3.9/4.0GPA - Summa Cum Laude!

I am a non-traditional/international student, and an A is the key to my future studies/academic endeavours in the United States.

Thank you very much for your time, attention and consideration.

Warmest regards,
Stu"

Yeah, I didn't see one either.

[kaysixteen]

I don't get it-- is the glitch his fault or not?  What exactly is this student talking about?

[FishProf]

The glitch was a blackboard default setting that was causing inaccurate grades.  I fixed it and told the class about it.

[the_geneticist]

Student is shocked, I say, shocked that I wouldn't let him participate when he arrived 20 minutes late for lab. 

He tried arguing with the TA, TA sent SUS to me, I said he was too late to participate & to email me.

Hello, I am the guy that you didn't let in the lab today. Is it possible that you can send me the make up online, thanks.
[Super Upset Student]

At least he said thanks at the end. 

Was it you who had a TA that would have allowed Stu to participate? Pardon the syntax--it's been a long day.

Yes, I've had some overly lax/non-confrontational TAs who would have let them in.  Makes the job harder for everyone else.

[FishProf]

Email and Bang Your Head entry.  This is an entirely online course.  It began on May 20.  Drop deadline was May 28, which was also the syllabus quiz deadline.  Today, June 19, I got this gem.

"Dear professor. Fishprof , my name is [Stu] and I am in your summer course for [Social Baskets], I have not had my computer until just today as i had to ship to Apple for fixing. I will be caught up on all work asap, if still possible for grading that would be much appreciated, sorry about the late notice. I hope all is well .

Sincerely [Stu]"

Does this person think the online course only works on his specific computer? The rate at which work must be done, in the full 7-week semester, is 11 items a week (about 1.5/day).  For [Stu], it is now 31 items a week, or about 4 a day.  He has about 30 hours of videos, and ~20 hours of lectures, to watch.  Then there are the readings.  Every one of these items has a quiz associated with it.

Good luck.

[fosca]

Students are sometimes amazed when I suggest going to the library and using the computers there when their computer is on the fritz.  Or taking a laptop to the library or anywhere with WiFi.  I'm not sure if it's feigned or if in the past that's been acceptable or if they just don't think about different ways to do things.  In my experience I see quite a bit of the latter: students have issues and they just sit there waiting for someone to help them instead of figuring out different ways to do something (Student: "I can't find [whatever] in the text."  Me: "Did you try the index?"  Student: "There's an index?" And sometimes it's "What's that?")

[FishProf]

In addition, today is a school holiday.  I am disinclined to respond until tomorrow.  By my syllabus policy, it's 24 hours response time, excluding weekends and holidays, so no need to reply until Friday.

decisions, decisions....

[kaysixteen]

Welcome to the way these kids have been raised and educated, esp during Covid America.  With specific regard to the kid who did not seem to realize that his work could be accomplished on anything other than his own personal computer, is there not some sort of advisor who would have checked on him and helped him to, ahem, see the error of his ways?

[marshwiggle]

Welcome to the way these kids have been raised and educated, esp during Covid America. 

Actually, I think it goes before that to the whole "digital native" nonsense. What it really means is that they rely on apps, AIs, algorithms, etc. to do anything they need to do, and when those don't work, they're totally lost.

Calling them "digital natives" is like calling drug addicts "pharmaceutical natives".

[FishProf]

... is there not some sort of advisor who would have checked on him and helped him to, ahem, see the error of his ways?

In a regular semester, yes, there would have been a flag raised due to low/non-attendance.  In the summer, the system isn't active, and faculty aren't around, so there would be no one to see the flag.

I don't even know if he is a FishProfU student or a summer transient.

[apl68]

Students are sometimes amazed when I suggest going to the library and using the computers there when their computer is on the fritz.  Or taking a laptop to the library or anywhere with WiFi.  I'm not sure if it's feigned or if in the past that's been acceptable or if they just don't think about different ways to do things.  In my experience I see quite a bit of the latter: students have issues and they just sit there waiting for someone to help them instead of figuring out different ways to do something (Student: "I can't find [whatever] in the text."  Me: "Did you try the index?"  Student: "There's an index?" And sometimes it's "What's that?")

We're just seeing so much growing evidence of what looks like a form of cognitive impairment among contemporary youth.  Their thinking seems to have no flexibility or adaptability at all.  It's as if everything is totally siloed from everything else.  What's disturbing is that I've been seeing this in the workforce, not just in educational settings.

[bio-nonymous]

Welcome to the way these kids have been raised and educated, esp during Covid America. 

Actually, I think it goes before that to the whole "digital native" nonsense. What it really means is that they rely on apps, AIs, algorithms, etc. to do anything they need to do, and when those don't work, they're totally lost.

Calling them "digital natives" is like calling drug addicts "pharmaceutical natives".

I agree 100%. I had a very nice long conversation about computers with the Network Engineering CS student who works for our IT department to deliver/set-up new faculty computers when he came by with my new laptop. He had never heard of DOS, Apple 2, floppy disks, or really much of anything related to computers that wasn't about "apps". I spent a lot of time mentoring him on building computer systems for particular applications. He was a great kid, but a bit clueless about computers beyond Apple MacBooks and how to load apps on Dell Windows laptops (especially considering what I had expected for an upperclass computer science major!). He thanks me profusely for my time and said he learned so much from me. NOTE: I am no IT guy--I am a biomedical scientist.

I think the digital native thing is like calling someone a mechanic because they just got their driver's license.

[AmLitHist]

Email and Bang Your Head entry.  This is an entirely online course.  It began on May 20.  Drop deadline was May 28, which was also the syllabus quiz deadline.  Today, June 19, I got this gem.

"Dear professor. Fishprof , my name is [Stu] and I am in your summer course for [Social Baskets], I have not had my computer until just today as i had to ship to Apple for fixing. I will be caught up on all work asap, if still possible for grading that would be much appreciated, sorry about the late notice. I hope all is well .

Sincerely [Stu]"

Does this person think the online course only works on his specific computer? The rate at which work must be done, in the full 7-week semester, is 11 items a week (about 1.5/day).  For [Stu], it is now 31 items a week, or about 4 a day.  He has about 30 hours of videos, and ~20 hours of lectures, to watch.  Then there are the readings.  Every one of these items has a quiz associated with it.

Good luck.

In a similar vein, I've been blasted this week (Week 3 of a 6- and an 8-week set of Comp I summer classes) with varieties of, "I know the syllabus says 'no late submissions accepted, no exceptions,' but. . . "

NO, students.  Stop right there--there is no "but" stated or implied in the syllabus policy!

[There is a clear discussion of options for a true emergency situation, but procrastination, computer problems, and "I forgot" are explicitly excluded as "emergencies." There is also a clearly-stated process to get a one-time, no-questions-asked extension for one assignment. Of course, there haven't been any emergencies yet, and nobody can be arsed to asked for an extension. Oh well, less grading for me. And yes, I know my attitude sucks. What can I say?  I'm a product of my environment.]

To be fair, I actually do have a number of excellent students this summer, as is always the case because of people from other universities picking up some gen ed credits at my CC. It's just the PitAs that don't get much of a break from me, and almost without fail, these are our "native" students, often retaking gen eds that they've failed in the past (often more than once). E.g., I have one student retaking Comp I for the fifth time this summer, and she already has a stellar 4.6% at nearly the halfway point of the 6-week class. The chance to work with these really good "foreign" students is what keeps me teaching in the summer, though.