Favorite student emails

[marshwiggle]

Got a new one:

Good Evening Dr. [Geneticist],
I was writing you this email in regard to the final on Friday. Would it be possible to take it Thursday instead? My family is leaving for a cruise Friday morning and I would prefer to get it out of the way the day before. If there is anyway you can make that happen it would be so appreciated. Thank You so much in advance.

Sincerely,

[cruising stu]

I'd prefer you take it as scheduled.
Also, the exam is online. 

This is why I have in bold on the syllabus "Non-emergency travel is NOT an excused absence. Per university policy final exams can only be given in their designated time slots. Do NOT book travel until the final exam schedule is posted!" Still, there is always at least one who thinks surely this does not apply to them.

"BUT MOMMY AND DADDY BOOKED THE CRUISE! IT'S NOT MY FAULT!!!!!"

[Langue_doc]

Don't you just love the way Stu wants to "get the final exam out of the way", as though it's an unimportant boring chore that just needs to be done.

Here exams are scheduled by the registrar's office with classrooms allocated by the same office. No early exams, not even online ones. Epic fail in not reading the syllabus or understanding due dates.

[apl68]

Got a new one:

Good Evening Dr. [Geneticist],
I was writing you this email in regard to the final on Friday. Would it be possible to take it Thursday instead? My family is leaving for a cruise Friday morning and I would prefer to get it out of the way the day before. If there is anyway you can make that happen it would be so appreciated. Thank You so much in advance.

Sincerely,

[cruising stu]

I'd prefer you take it as scheduled.
Also, the exam is online. 

This is why I have in bold on the syllabus "Non-emergency travel is NOT an excused absence. Per university policy final exams can only be given in their designated time slots. Do NOT book travel until the final exam schedule is posted!" Still, there is always at least one who thinks surely this does not apply to them.

"BUT MOMMY AND DADDY BOOKED THE CRUISE! IT'S NOT MY FAULT!!!!!"

I've heard that schools in recent years have had a growing problem with students taking off on family vacations before the semester is over, or at other times when it means cutting school days.  If parents have already set those kinds of priorities in K-12, then it's easy to see that mentality carrying over to college.

I don't recall stuff like this happening when I was a teaching assistant in the 1990s.  Or maybe it did, and the instructor of record was the one who had to deal with all of it.  I did personally take off two weeks from college in the fall of 1988.  I had a once-in-a-lifetime chance to accompany my father on a short-term mission trip in Central America, and it was a church-supported university, so the profs considered it excused.  And I didn't miss any exams.  Had to scramble a good bit to catch up when I got back, though.

[the_geneticist]

Don't you just love the way Stu wants to "get the final exam out of the way", as though it's an unimportant boring chore that just needs to be done.

Here exams are scheduled by the registrar's office with classrooms allocated by the same office. No early exams, not even online ones. Epic fail in not reading the syllabus or understanding due dates.

Yep.  Especially since the day & time were in the syllabus & available MONTHS in advance on the Registrar's website.
And Finals are through the end of next week, hope they aren't taking too many Summer classes.  Stu's going to be in the cruise ship Internet cafe for a lot of their trip.

[FishProf]

"Happy Friday!

 I understand that classes begin next week, however I will be out of state. I will make up any work that is needed and I will be checking my emails while I am away.

I apologize for my poorly timed trip! I was under the impression that the fall semester started the week after Labor Day, not the week of Labor day.

have a great holiday weekend,
[Stu]"

[the_geneticist]

"Happy Friday!

 I understand that classes begin next week, however I will be out of state. I will make up any work that is needed and I will be checking my emails while I am away.

I apologize for my poorly timed trip! I was under the impression that the fall semester started the week after Labor Day, not the week of Labor day.

have a great holiday weekend,
[Stu]"

Here, the policy is that if your class has a waitlist & you are absent, then you are dropped.  Exceptions can be made for emergencies (e.g. COVID) or at the instructor's discretion.  Stu is going to be in for a very rude awakening!

I've had to tell more than one student that their family trip/vacation/other non-emergency *explains* why they were gone, but does not *excuse* them from any missed assignments.  And that it's up to them to catch up on any missed learning, I'm not going to give them a private lesson.

[AmLitHist]

^^ The Geneticist is a meeeeanie!

<ducks and hobbles away!>

(I'm a meanie, too.)

[the_geneticist]

I try for "reasonable, fair, & consistent"

But I'll happily take Big Meanie Pants since students that start behind rarely catch up.

[EdnaMode]

Just received this one:

>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>
Hey there Dr. Mode,

I wanted to let you know (though I'm sure it's not needed) that I'm gonna be submitting my homework 1 due today late along with me potentially needing to resubmit my [files] for lab 1. Like a slacker I am I had thought I could wrap up things an hour prior to lab. I was sadly mistaken. I now remember my awful habits from [prereq courses] and hope and pray I don't make this a common occurrence. Have a wonderful rest of your day,

Stu Dent
>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>

I replied and reminded him of the standard late work penalty and that work would not be accepted after the dropbox closed so he should pay attention to the times in Canvas. **sigh** At least he was polite in the message. But it's only the first day of the second week and he's already digging himself in a hole. It took him twice to get through each of the prereq courses and he's notorious amongst the faculty for arguing for every partial point and having some very entertaining excuses for his poor performance and absences.

[the_geneticist]

Stu needs to get a day planner, not a prayer card.

[Liquidambar]

My freshmen are very polite and concerned about their studies.  I appreciate this.  However, I don't need any more emails apologizing that they can't get to class on time due to construction.  I know this is a problem.  However, attendance isn't required, so I do not care!

Signed,
Grumpy professor who is tired of listening to construction equipment

[kaysixteen]

If the construction really is making it substantially more difficult for students to get from point a to point b, is the campus admin doing anything to ameliorate this problem?

[Liquidambar]

If the construction really is making it substantially more difficult for students to get from point a to point b, is the campus admin doing anything to ameliorate this problem?

Nothing significant that I'm aware of.  Students with disabilities are ferried around on golf carts, but the average student just has to walk more quickly.  The class schedule hasn't changed to give us longer breaks between classes.  I think admin expects the problem to solve itself in a few months to a few years when the construction projects finish.

[kaysixteen]

Is this school basically a commuter campus where many if not most student drive themselves to school and may, even before the construction, have had to schlepp themselves a good long way to get to any academic buildings?

[Liquidambar]

Nope, mostly residential.  I'm surprised so many students choose to come despite the construction and the decaying state of our dorms.  Maybe the incoming students are looking forward to amazing new buildings that should open before they finish their schooling.

However, we should take this discussion to a different thread to avoid derailing this one further.  I was just grumpy about receiving so many of the same unnecessary email.