Favorite student emails

[kaysixteen]

Might this be a situation where you should contact his advisor?

[the_geneticist]

An email exchange with a student who is "very concerned" about his grade (bold added for emphasis in his reply).

Stu,

I understand you are concerned about your overall grade, attending class regularly is important for success. For example, last week, you skipped Monday's lecture, were significantly late to lab on Tuesday morning, and missed lab on Thursday. This week you were significantly late for Tuesday's lab and turned your work in late which earned a late penalty.

To improve your work on graded assignments, I suggest reading the feedback you have received on your work. You continue to repeat similar errors on your work, and this leads me to believe you are not paying close attention to the feedback supplied on the grading rubrics. Once you have done that, and if you have questions about what you are not doing correctly, stop by my office during office hours and we can answer those questions.

Dr. Mode

>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>

Hey,

I know I missed lecture last week, and I had [another class exam] that day that I was studying for, and I know that's no excuse and then I saw we had a 5 point assignment that day, which was irritating. I am usually up on the weekends and especially monday night until 2 am every week trying to make your labs the best that I can and I just can't seem to do it. My grade is low right now so I need everything I can at this point to pass. I never emailed you or asked for help before but I figured it was worth a shot so thank you. Just let me know what I can do to make things better, thank you again.
 
Stu

What does he expect me to do? I already told him what he could do to make it better. Guess he wants 'bonus points' or perhaps to redo previous work. Who knows? I'm delaying another reply.

Yikes.  Stu is going to be so "sad and confused" that being late, being absent, and not using feedback means they will struggle and probably won't pass.

"Stu,
The most important things you can do to improve your grade are to come to class on time and turn in your assignments.
Dr. Giant Meanie who doesn't give magic bonus points"

[EdnaMode]

Might this be a situation where you should contact his advisor?

We have an online system where we can submit progress reports and the info is shared with their advisor. I've already flagged Stu twice in the system. I even included the email exchange.

Yikes.  Stu is going to be so "sad and confused" that being late, being absent, and not using feedback means they will struggle and probably won't pass.

"Stu,
The most important things you can do to improve your grade are to come to class on time and turn in your assignments.
Dr. Giant Meanie who doesn't give magic bonus points"

Yes, he is going to be "sad and confused." I remember that from the old boards :) I did write him a reply and basically said just that... come to class, do the work, ask questions if you have them, and you just might pass.

[the_geneticist]

Got one today that reminds me what I like about online assignments:

Good Morning Dr. [Geneticist]

I hope you're having a great morning and are doing well! This is [stu] and I wanted to reach out to you regarding the [assigment from 2 weeks ago]; I opened the assignment during Friday afternoon, however, it didn't submit until later in the evening (that is the time that got recorded in the submission). This issue's never occurred with me before while using [the LMS]. I understand that assignments marked as late are given 0 points, but I'm not sure why this issue occurred because it should have submitted earlier in the day prior to the due date at 5 pm. Please let me know if anything can be done when you are able to, thank you immensely for your time and help in advance. I hope you have a wonderful day and upcoming week!

Kind Regards,
[late submission stu]

Polite, got my name correct. 

But, what stu doesn't realize is it is so easy to check when they open an assignment, the time they spent, and if/when they submit.

Opened: 7:27pm
Time: 2 minutes 30 seconds
Submitted: 7:30pm

Sorry stu, you didn't even start the assignment before the deadline.  Plan better.

[sinenomine]

Got one today that reminds me what I like about online assignments:

Good Morning Dr. [Geneticist]

I hope you're having a great morning and are doing well! This is [stu] and I wanted to reach out to you regarding the [assigment from 2 weeks ago]; I opened the assignment during Friday afternoon, however, it didn't submit until later in the evening (that is the time that got recorded in the submission). This issue's never occurred with me before while using [the LMS]. I understand that assignments marked as late are given 0 points, but I'm not sure why this issue occurred because it should have submitted earlier in the day prior to the due date at 5 pm. Please let me know if anything can be done when you are able to, thank you immensely for your time and help in advance. I hope you have a wonderful day and upcoming week!

Kind Regards,
[late submission stu]

Polite, got my name correct. 

But, what stu doesn't realize is it is so easy to check when they open an assignment, the time they spent, and if/when they submit.

Opened: 7:27pm
Time: 2 minutes 30 seconds
Submitted: 7:30pm

Sorry stu, you didn't even start the assignment before the deadline.  Plan better.

I love sending them screenshots showing the access and submission times. :) I've only had one student try to argue back; it escalated from our IT folks all the way to the LMS company before the student grudgingly admitted defeat.

[apl68]

Got one today that reminds me what I like about online assignments:

Good Morning Dr. [Geneticist]

I hope you're having a great morning and are doing well! This is [stu] and I wanted to reach out to you regarding the [assigment from 2 weeks ago]; I opened the assignment during Friday afternoon, however, it didn't submit until later in the evening (that is the time that got recorded in the submission). This issue's never occurred with me before while using [the LMS]. I understand that assignments marked as late are given 0 points, but I'm not sure why this issue occurred because it should have submitted earlier in the day prior to the due date at 5 pm. Please let me know if anything can be done when you are able to, thank you immensely for your time and help in advance. I hope you have a wonderful day and upcoming week!

Kind Regards,
[late submission stu]

Polite, got my name correct. 

But, what stu doesn't realize is it is so easy to check when they open an assignment, the time they spent, and if/when they submit.

Opened: 7:27pm
Time: 2 minutes 30 seconds
Submitted: 7:30pm

Sorry stu, you didn't even start the assignment before the deadline.  Plan better.

I love sending them screenshots showing the access and submission times. :) I've only had one student try to argue back; it escalated from our IT folks all the way to the LMS company before the student grudgingly admitted defeat.

If somebody is that determined to stand by a bald-faced lie with regard to an assignment, you have to wonder what else that person is capable of.

[the_geneticist]

Got one today that reminds me what I like about online assignments:

Good Morning Dr. [Geneticist]

I hope you're having a great morning and are doing well! This is [stu] and I wanted to reach out to you regarding the [assigment from 2 weeks ago]; I opened the assignment during Friday afternoon, however, it didn't submit until later in the evening (that is the time that got recorded in the submission). This issue's never occurred with me before while using [the LMS]. I understand that assignments marked as late are given 0 points, but I'm not sure why this issue occurred because it should have submitted earlier in the day prior to the due date at 5 pm. Please let me know if anything can be done when you are able to, thank you immensely for your time and help in advance. I hope you have a wonderful day and upcoming week!

Kind Regards,
[late submission stu]

Polite, got my name correct. 

But, what stu doesn't realize is it is so easy to check when they open an assignment, the time they spent, and if/when they submit.

Opened: 7:27pm
Time: 2 minutes 30 seconds
Submitted: 7:30pm

Sorry stu, you didn't even start the assignment before the deadline.  Plan better.

I love sending them screenshots showing the access and submission times. :) I've only had one student try to argue back; it escalated from our IT folks all the way to the LMS company before the student grudgingly admitted defeat.

If somebody is that determined to stand by a bald-faced lie with regard to an assignment, you have to wonder what else that person is capable of.

Eh, I'm not too concerned.  They are probably hoping I'd let it slide since this is a TINY assignment.  Ironically, the reason I am NOT flexible is because this is a tiny assignment. 

This is probably the first time that a due date has been firm since they are a Fall term Freshmen.
I'd rather they learn that lesson on something small than miss a project deadline or a midterm.

[RatGuy]

Student emailed me to say that he was going to miss this morning's class because last night the fire department was called to his dorm because he got stuck in the garbage chute. The tone of the email was lighthearted and self-deprecating ("you're never going to believe this") and ended with a plea for grace: "I know your policy is that I need to be in class to turn in the homework but can you make an exception given my extraordinary circumstances?" I normally don't want to know their absence excuses but I really want to know more about this one.

[bio-nonymous]

Student emailed me to say that he was going to miss this morning's class because last night the fire department was called to his dorm because he got stuck in the garbage chute. The tone of the email was lighthearted and self-deprecating ("you're never going to believe this") and ended with a plea for grace: "I know your policy is that I need to be in class to turn in the homework but can you make an exception given my extraordinary circumstances?" I normally don't want to know their absence excuses but I really want to know more about this one.

HA! I would probably let whatever slide--points for creativity even if not true...

[the_geneticist]

Student emailed me to say that he was going to miss this morning's class because last night the fire department was called to his dorm because he got stuck in the garbage chute. The tone of the email was lighthearted and self-deprecating ("you're never going to believe this") and ended with a plea for grace: "I know your policy is that I need to be in class to turn in the homework but can you make an exception given my extraordinary circumstances?" I normally don't want to know their absence excuses but I really want to know more about this one.

HA! I would probably let whatever slide--points for creativity even if not true...

Pics or it didn't happen! 
Actually, I'm totally included to believe that sort of zany story.  He probably has a report from the fire crew to document his doofus choices.

[apl68]

And no doubt pics on his dorm mates' social media.

[marshwiggle]

And no doubt pics on his dorm mates' social media.

Who do you think TOLD him to climb into the garbage chute?

[apl68]

You really do wonder if there's a bit of a story behind that.  Maybe an ill-advised attempt to retrieve something accidentally dropped down the shaft?

At least they weren't "elevator surfing."  Several college students were killed or seriously injured doing that in the 1990s.  There were rumors of it being tried at the university where I was a grad student.

[RatGuy]

You really do wonder if there's a bit of a story behind that.  Maybe an ill-advised attempt to retrieve something accidentally dropped down the shaft?

At least they weren't "elevator surfing."  Several college students were killed or seriously injured doing that in the 1990s.  There were rumors of it being tried at the university where I was a grad student.

My first year here, we had two student deaths due to pedestrians trying to scoot between a train stopped on the tracks. The tracks pass near campus, and student housing is on the outside of that. Students who walk campus sometimes find a train parked there, and it was seen as par for the course to step between the cars -- until the train suddenly moves and they're killed. It actually prompted the university to erect a pedestrian bridge over the the tracks.

[the_geneticist]

If a student has an emergency (sick, car trouble, etc.), we allow them to go to another section of [baskets] discussions if there are seats available.
I'm getting emails saying "I can go to the [clay pots] discussion" or "any discussions on Monday work for me (there are no discussions on Mondays)" or "I can come in next week and do both discussions!" or "I'll come to your office hours and do the discussion".

No
Nope
Also no
Not an option

You have to go to a section of [baskets] discussions.
It has to be a section that exists
Also, must be that same week
And just no