Dealing with Stress

[Sun_Worshiper]

Careful dude.  The distance from that high horse you are on to the ground is bigger than you think.

As to perhaps more useful advice for the OP.....

What would happen if you delayed going up for full for a year.  Ideally, that would give you some breathing room to manage the low level chaos and get your support people in place and trained.

Just a thought. 

Agreed that the "everyone always has time to eat healthy" may be underestimating the extra bandwidth involved in making sure you have non-rotting healthy food components on hand.

And in some cases I have seen, having a year break between being "in charge" and asking the people you were "in charge" of to vote for your promotion is a good thing (this obviously varies greatly from situation to situation).

But for me (and I'm in a kind of similar place right now) what's helped at least a bit is to start thinking about which balls I'm juggling will bounce and which won't. Even without advanced permission, the only thing that happens where I am if we miss the deadline for assessment reports is cranky emails until we are over 3 months late, so that's a bouncy ball for example.

It takes more bandwidth to buy healthy food from the store than unhealthy food? I don't follow. And if the concern is that fruits and veggies go rotten, then buy frozen ones.

Look, I know that I'm derailing the thread and I'm sorry if it is annoying people or making them feel bad, but the perpetuation of this myth that it is easier and faster to eat junk food is not doing anyone any favors.

[Hegemony]

I think the word that comes to mind is "sanctimonious."

[OneMoreYear]

It takes more bandwidth to buy healthy food from the store than unhealthy food? I don't follow..

For me, change takes more bandwidth. Results on some recent health metrics indicated that I needed to make some significant changes in my diet.  I do now need to think about what I am eating more than I did in the past, so, yes, there is more bandwidth involved in planning meals, purchasing food, and cooking for me at this time. Some of my go-to/easy prep foods for times of stress are now things I need to eat in more limited amounts or not eat at all

[spork]

I now apply Cher's strategy to my work:

"If it doesn't matter in five years, it doesn't matter."

It's a remarkable useful heuristic.

Another strategy, which could be a corollary of the above principle:

"If it's so important that I attend this meeting, put me on the agenda."   

[Sun_Worshiper]

I think the word that comes to mind is "sanctimonious."

You can call names if you want, but what I'm saying is true and a lot of people need to hear it.

It takes more bandwidth to buy healthy food from the store than unhealthy food? I don't follow..

For me, change takes more bandwidth. Results on some recent health metrics indicated that I needed to make some significant changes in my diet.  I do now need to think about what I am eating more than I did in the past, so, yes, there is more bandwidth involved in planning meals, purchasing food, and cooking for me at this time. Some of my go-to/easy prep foods for times of stress are now things I need to eat in more limited amounts or not eat at all

This is actually one of those times when ChatGPT can be your friend. Ask it to give you a low/no prep meal healthy meal plan.

[FishProf]

but the perpetuation of this myth that it is easier and faster to eat junk food is not doing anyone any favors.

That isn't a myth.  It IS easier and faster.  IF it weren't, you'd be in the position of arguing that people choose a less healthful, harder and longer to acquire diet over a healthier, easier and faster to acquire one.  That doesn't make sense.

[Sun_Worshiper]

but the perpetuation of this myth that it is easier and faster to eat junk food is not doing anyone any favors.

That isn't a myth.  It IS easier and faster.  IF it weren't, you'd be in the position of arguing that people choose a less healthful, harder and longer to acquire diet over a healthier, easier and faster to acquire one.  That doesn't make sense.

People choose to eat junk food because it is delicious - it is literally engineered to be so tasty and addictive that people can't stop themselves from eating it. In contrast, eating packets of salmon and celery aren't tasty or satisfying to most people.

And I understand why people want to insist that they have no choice but to eat junk - whether because they are busy or because it is so expensive to eat in a healthy way (which is also not true). And from a will-power standpoint or a status quo bias standpoint it is of course easier to keep doing what you're already doing. But from a simple time management perspective, it does not take any more time to prep and eat a bag of unsalted almonds than a bag of chips, salmon packets than frozen meals, or plain greek yogurt and granola rather than a bagel and cream cheese.

And since this thread is about OP's situation, I suggest everyone revisit their opening post, where they say that they are hopelessly stressed and that their diet has gone to hell. This person is putting their physical health at risk with this lifestyle and eating a healthier diet is an easy (from a time management perspective) thing they can do to feel better and to relieve physical and mental stress. Anyone telling OP that eating well is going to be too difficult because of the intensive time it takes to do so is giving terrible advice.

[FishProf]

I'm replying to YOUR post.  What you said above was devoid of the nuance you just put in.

Explanations and justifications aren't the same thing.  Just because something is easier and/or faster isn't a good reason to do it.  But it IS a reason.  When you deny that simple reality (as your post did), you are saying there is no explanation of the behavior.  Failing to recognize part of the reason something occurs is no way to prevent that thing.

It is "more expensive to eat healthy" (see https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC5708033/ for one example of a study showing this).  Junk food is easier to acquire, and there is a crisis is some inner city areas where healthful foods are increasingly difficult to get.

None of that is to say "people want to insist that they have no choice but to eat junk" is a valid claim.  It isn't.  But there are obstacles to be overcome in changing from a less to a more healthful diet.  Claiming otherwise sound preachy (someone said 'sanctimonious') to me.

[Sun_Worshiper]

I'm replying to YOUR post.  What you said above was devoid of the nuance you just put in.

Explanations and justifications aren't the same thing.  Just because something is easier and/or faster isn't a good reason to do it.  But it IS a reason.  When you deny that simple reality (as your post did), you are saying there is no explanation of the behavior.  Failing to recognize part of the reason something occurs is no way to prevent that thing.

It is "more expensive to eat healthy" (see https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC5708033/ for one example of a study showing this).  Junk food is easier to acquire, and there is a crisis is some inner city areas where healthful foods are increasingly difficult to get.

None of that is to say "people want to insist that they have no choice but to eat junk" is a valid claim.  It isn't.  But there are obstacles to be overcome in changing from a less to a more healthful diet.  Claiming otherwise sound preachy (someone said 'sanctimonious') to me.

If you read all my comments throughout the thread, in the context of the OP, then it should be pretty clear what I am saying. If it was not sufficiently nuanced for you, then hopefully it is now.

What I'm saying may come off to you as being sanctimonious, but there is no moral judgement on my part. I choose to eat junk food too sometimes, even while knowing that it is bad for my health. But it takes me just as long, if not longer, than it would to eat something healthy from my refrigerator. To be fair, I don't live in a food desert, but it doesn't seem that anyone else in this thread does either, so while I certainly agree with your point that there are structural factors that make it difficult for some people to access healthy foods, it is totally irrelevant to the conversation at hand.

As for your study, like any good scientist I can find one that shows the opposite to be true: https://www.ers.usda.gov/webdocs/publications/44678/19980_eib96.pdf.

[FishProf]

I reread all your posts.  It is pretty clear what you are saying.  I'll stand by my assessment.

[Sun_Worshiper]

I reread all your posts.  It is pretty clear what you are saying.  I'll stand by my assessment.

*shrugs*

[little bongo]

As we're all aware, it's hard to maintain "tone" in writing, so one person's helpfulness can be another's sanctimony. I certainly didn't see any intentional "judginess" in any of the responses. Sometimes we've got something that works and we get a little frustrated that other folks can't see it. FWIW, I've wound up putting two regular respondents on my ignore list--one a moderator who I thought was kind of a meanie, and the other a seemingly (admittedly, IMO) professional troll. But if I actually spoke to them face to face, I might catch a glimpse of humanity that I missed.

I've often thought that the world will end neither in fire nor ice, nor with bang nor whimper, but rather a shrug.

[secundem_artem]

I do an in class discussion assignment where we look at a single mom who has 3 kids and also has both time and financial pressures.  Her kids are fussy eaters.  Family history is that they are all on the chubby side.

Dinner choices include:

Kraft Dinner - 2 boxes from Wally Mart and a half gallon of milk. 20 minutes preparation time, kids like it, total cost ~ $5. Dinner has same nutritional value as the box it came in.

Frozen Pizza - 2 pepperoni pizzas from Wally Mart. As cheap as $6 + cost of milk.  Kids like it, 30 minutes preparation time to pre-heat the oven and bake the pies.

McD - 3 Happy Meals and 1 Big Mac Value Meal for Mom - 3 x ~$7 + $12 =$32. Kids like it. Zero preparation time.

Roast Chicken, Mashed Potatoes, Broccoli w Cheese Sauce Milk & Fruit Cup - Wally Mart Prices - Chicken $7, 1/2 a 5 lb bag of potatoes - $2.50. Fresh Broccoli - $1.50. Cheese/Milk/Butter for potatoes & broccoli - $2. Fruit cups 1/2 of a 12 pack - $4. Milk $2.50  Total cost about $14.00

BUT - Preparation time is ~ 90 minutes after every one is home from school and already hungry, Not a lot of appeal to most children except for maybe the chicken and the cheese sauce.

Given the circumstances under which a person like this lives, making poor choices can have quite reasonable explanations.  The healthy meal is cheaper than the McD but more expensive than the other options, and requires more time shopping, more time cooking, more time cleaning up and kids are notoriously fussy eaters whom mom does not want to have to wrangle into eating their dinner.

It's easy to be critical of food choices, but without knowing somebody's personal circumstances, I try to avoid being too critical - but then again I just had a pack of ramen noodles for lunch, so I'm no model of dietary wisdom. 

[dismalist]

I think that's very insightful.

However, it leaves out one variable -- income. It is apparently high enough to enable the purchase of time-saving food, but not high enough to incentivize working less to leave more time to prepare food.

Thank god for junk food!

[Sun_Worshiper]

I do an in class discussion assignment where we look at a single mom who has 3 kids and also has both time and financial pressures.  Her kids are fussy eaters.  Family history is that they are all on the chubby side.

Dinner choices include:

Kraft Dinner - 2 boxes from Wally Mart and a half gallon of milk. 20 minutes preparation time, kids like it, total cost ~ $5. Dinner has same nutritional value as the box it came in.

Frozen Pizza - 2 pepperoni pizzas from Wally Mart. As cheap as $6 + cost of milk.  Kids like it, 30 minutes preparation time to pre-heat the oven and bake the pies.

McD - 3 Happy Meals and 1 Big Mac Value Meal for Mom - 3 x ~$7 + $12 =$32. Kids like it. Zero preparation time.

Roast Chicken, Mashed Potatoes, Broccoli w Cheese Sauce Milk & Fruit Cup - Wally Mart Prices - Chicken $7, 1/2 a 5 lb bag of potatoes - $2.50. Fresh Broccoli - $1.50. Cheese/Milk/Butter for potatoes & broccoli - $2. Fruit cups 1/2 of a 12 pack - $4. Milk $2.50  Total cost about $14.00

BUT - Preparation time is ~ 90 minutes after every one is home from school and already hungry, Not a lot of appeal to most children except for maybe the chicken and the cheese sauce.

Given the circumstances under which a person like this lives, making poor choices can have quite reasonable explanations.  The healthy meal is cheaper than the McD but more expensive than the other options, and requires more time shopping, more time cooking, more time cleaning up and kids are notoriously fussy eaters whom mom does not want to have to wrangle into eating their dinner.

It's easy to be critical of food choices, but without knowing somebody's personal circumstances, I try to avoid being too critical - but then again I just had a pack of ramen noodles for lunch, so I'm no model of dietary wisdom. 

Ok but what does any of this have to do with the conversation in this thread? OP is not a poor single mother with fussy kids, they are an overworked administrator with a terrible diet. You are creating this complex thought experiment, which I would take a lot of issue with if I felt like debating it, to make some point that has nothing to do with the issue at hand.

And I'm not being critical of anyone for their dietary choices. Eat what you want - it is your body. I'm challenging the myth that it is so time consuming to prepare and eat a healthy meal. And frankly nobody in this thread has disputed that with anything substantive.