restaurants-- when to complain

[kaysixteen]

Having had a recent medical test to perform at a hospital in the city (30 mi away) where my PCP practices, I popped in beforehand to a local diner there, which I have occasionally eated in over the years, for lunch.  I ordered something I had never tried before, buffalo chicken mac and cheese, and, well, it was not good.   The chicken was overcooked, and the pasta was mushy.   I did force myself to eat most of it.   Meanwhile, I was doing this in a dining room that was, ahem, freezing (I do allow that my pretty severe anemia does reduce my resistance to cold).  Ah well... I said nothing to the waitress about either issue, largely because 1) this is the sort of place where most of the diners were elderly, local, obviously regular clients, and maybe they like these things this way, and esp 2) I did not want any complaints from me to get anyone sacked.   But I am wondering, under what circumstances do you all complain in restaurants?

[nebo113]

Oh good grief.

[apl68]

I've really only ever complained in restaurants when they've forgotten my order and I ended up never getting served.  Which has happened to me a surprising number of times over the years.  Maybe, like Charlie Brown, I'm just a somewhat easy person to overlook? 

Otherwise I don't figure sub-optimal dining experiences are that much worth complaining about.  Either I don't go back, or I hope that they were having an off day and that things will be better next time.

[jerseyjay]

What do you want to get out of complaining?

Regarding the temperature, the time to have complained was at the moment. More specifically, to have asked if the heat could have been turned up.

In regards to the food itself, leaving aside the fact that it is a diner, you now know you do not like the dish. It seems you have three options: 1) never go back to the diner again; 2)if you go back to the diner again, order something else; 3)if you do back to the diner again and order the same thing, hope that it is better this time; 4)if you do back to the diner again and order the same food, ask that they prepare it the way you would like it.

The diner near my house has pretty mediocre food, and the only thing I like are the scrambled eggs (for breakfast) and the hamburgers (for lunch or dinner), so that's what I order.

I do not see what complaining will accomplish, especially now.

[Wahoo Redux]

I got sweet potatoes the other night which I could barely cut with the knife.  I didn't send them back because I would have been embarrassed, because I saw a cousin once have a meltdown in a restaurant because my ailing uncle was having trouble cutting his carrots and it was really embarrassing, and because the waitress was very nice and I didn't want to embarrass her.

We just won't go back there.

[Sun_Worshiper]

I reserve my complaints for major screw ups: when I was served chicken that was not fully cooked, when they forgot to cook and/or bring out my brother's food; when they refused to accept a valid coupon because "too many people use it." On these rare occasions, I will try to make it clear that I understand that it is probably not the waiter's fault, but that I really do have to say something because the problem is so egregious.

I have also been known to write a negative review on Yelp from time to time if the food or service was lousy. After all, I am paying money for this and so I expect a certain level of quality.

Mostly though, I just make a mental note not to go back.

I got sweet potatoes the other night which I could barely cut with the knife.  I didn't send them back because I would have been embarrassed, because I saw a cousin once have a meltdown in a restaurant because my ailing uncle was having trouble cutting his carrots and it was really embarrassing, and because the waitress was very nice and I didn't want to embarrass her.

We just won't go back there.

I definitely would have sent it back. Although I like to think that I wouldn't have had a meltdown about it.

[dismalist]

Ah, the age old question: Exit or voice? The classic explication is A.O. Hirschman's Exit, Voice and Loyalty, 1970.

I don't recall that he gave an answer, but there are  criteria that give you the right answer, and he is descriptively interesting. I would say that if one is dealing with a highly competitive environment, such as retail, exit is the best answer. When dealing with competitively constrained environments, such as schools, voice is almost the only alternative. [Loyalty makes you use voice more frequently than otherwise.]

So, for restaurants in the densely supplied area were I live, after bad service I never complain and I never return .

[Langue_doc]

I never complain, but don't go back either. Why would the server get sacked? Even without the staff shortage, it's unlikely that a server would be fired because of a single complaint.

[Parasaurolophus]

Basically never.

Apart from the time I found glass in my burrito.

[secundem_artem]

Towards the end of his life, my father would only order fish and chips, or liver and bacon in a restaurant.  My sister in law made the mistake of taking the lot of us out for dinner in an Asian fusion place.

The chef-owner came out to ask how things were and Dad just lit into her.  Worst food he had ever eaten, could eat better in prison.  He went up one side of her and down the other.

As our group was leaving, I walked into the kitchen and apologized with every English language word I knew.  The chef was gracious enough to accept but certainly we never went out again unless the place offered one of the 2 items Dad would order and be happy with.  I think my brother left a tip the size of Rwanda's GDP.

As to Kay's question.  If the waitstaff come out and ask "how is everything" that's your time to indicate you are unhappy. You can send the plate back either to be replaced with another dish or otherwise corrected.  If they don't ask, just deal with it and assume the kitchen is having a bad day.  Just don't do like my dear departed father and blow the place to bits.

[Sun_Worshiper]

There has to be a middle point between blowing up on the wait staff and pretending everything is fine. If the food is terrible or wrong, then send it back. Do so politely.

[fishbrains]

From my 15 years working in food service: A well-run restaurant wants to know when there's a problem; it's worst nightmare is a customer who does not complain then just never comes back, especially if it's a local mom-and-pop shop. On the other hand, a poorly-run restaurant might do something kind of untoward to your food if you send it back.

The problem is that as a customer sitting at a table it's hard to tell what kind of place you're in if you're there for the first or second time. And the prices on the menu aren't always a good indicator.

[Langue_doc]

From my 15 years working in food service: A well-run restaurant wants to know when there's a problem; it's worst nightmare is a customer who does not complain then just never comes back, especially if it's a local mom-and-pop shop. On the other hand, a poorly-run restaurant might do something kind of untoward to your food if you send it back.

The problem is that as a customer sitting at a table it's hard to tell what kind of place you're in if you're there for the first or second time. And the prices on the menu aren't always a good indicator.

This is why I don't complain or go back.

[apl68]

My only complaint about eating out yesterday evening is that I somehow managed to drop my own hamburger and fries.  Twice.

[Sun_Worshiper]

From my 15 years working in food service: A well-run restaurant wants to know when there's a problem; it's worst nightmare is a customer who does not complain then just never comes back, especially if it's a local mom-and-pop shop. On the other hand, a poorly-run restaurant might do something kind of untoward to your food if you send it back.

The problem is that as a customer sitting at a table it's hard to tell what kind of place you're in if you're there for the first or second time. And the prices on the menu aren't always a good indicator.

I worked in a lot of restaurants in high school and college, including a few grimy ones, and I've never seen this happen. Not saying it never does, but rare I think.