elderly aunt is injured

[kaysixteen]

My aunt emailed me last night at 9:15, cc'd to her sister and brother-in-law who live in suburban Baltimore, and my brother, who is a US Navy officer serving in Europe.  It was not good news. She (77) said she had taken a fall at home and broken a pair of bones in one of her hands, thankfully her non-dominant one.  She said it was a 'long story' but that she was ok.  I replied immediately asking if she needed anything, and she said no.  I said fine but told her she was to call/ email immediately should this change, and told her I would be coming up to see her Sunday as always.  She said fine, and reiterated that she was ok-- her initial email helpfully included a picture of her hand, taken someplace I do not recognize, someplace that cannot have been her home-- she has no hardwood floors.  I confess I am very eager to learn what her 'long story' is, and so is my brother (I had a FB message convo with him a few hours later, after he got up for the day over there and found the message from her).  I told him I would try to get her to tell me this information Sunday, but would respect her wishes should she not want to share it.  I am wondering-- if she had some sort of freak accident that could happen to anyone regardless of age or physical condition, well that would be, whatever, but if she had some sort of elderly-related accident, that this might require me to do something, which I will do (she is in excellent physical and mental condition-- I last saw her Monday, though she did go through treatments for stage 1 breast cancer last spring/ summer).  But she is now, like it or not, all but deaf without her hearing aids-- I happened to find out just how deaf Monday, when I tried in vain to say something to her in her house when I first arrived, I in kitchen maybe 20 feet away from her in living room ensconced in her tablet (tv on in background), and she had not put hearing aids back in after apparently just having gotten out from shower (she was already dressed, it was past 2pm, and she knew I was coming by after doc visit, which she had asked me to do).  I am thus thinking something happened to her when not wearing them, that would probably not have happened had they been in, something perhaps related to her now also rather elderly but quite beloved pooch (she is a dog person of the highest order, and I am greatly pleased that she happened to have gotten this pooch six years back and only one month before my mom, with whom she lived, happened to die suddenly).  If this is the case, I will have to gently but firmly remind her that she must always put aids back in, as soon as she gets out of bed/ shower, etc.  But of course I do not know what is the case, and must try to find out, though, as I did tell my bro, I will respect her wishes if she does not want to share this information.  Thoughts and comments greatly appreciated....thanks!....

[apl68]

Best not to try pumping her for information too hard.  Give her some time to talk, and maybe a couple of diplomatic leading questions, and she'll probably get around to telling you what you need to know.

Sorry that this has happened to her, and prayers for her recovery. 

[kaysixteen]

I drove up to see her unannounced today, on way home from seeing doc.   She was in good spirits when she did get home, and happy to see me.   And she did tell me what happened.  Without my asking.  Turns out, it really was one of those accidents that could more or less have happened to anyone, and I never even bothered to ask whether hearing aids were in, because it would have made no diff if they weren't.  Doggo had indicated it was time for a walk, and headed to front door.  Aunt went up, but neglected to harness doggo to leash before opening door, and doggo bolted out (I can see this-- doggo almost bolted out on me today when I arrived).  Aunt ran out after her, and took header on driveway.   She is not badly injured, though in addition to two broken finger bones, she cut one finger badly enough to require 9 stitches.  She will be seeing hand specialist on Monday Jul 1st, and has to date not been given any predictions as to healing timetable.   Pain is ok, she was not given a prescription pain pill, only told to take tylenol, which seems to be working for her.  She seems ok.

[apl68]

Glad she's not in a great deal of pain and is in good spirits. 

Life is full of potential freak accidents like that.

[Wahoo Redux]

You're a good dude, K16.  I went through this with my mother.  Really, at this point, the only thing you can do is keep a very close watch.  Your aunt will probably appreciate the attention.

[AmLitHist]

Glad to hear it wasn't any worse, K16.  Mom had several such incidents that scared the daylights out of me over the years.

Hope you're feeling better, both with regard to her and with your own health issues!

[kaysixteen]

I saw her again today, and she seemed pretty darn good.   Probably dodged a bullet here.  I even got more or less all the work I needed to get done done for her.

My own health is improving, though I am at pains to acknowledge that I do not know how much of this is due merely to my not, ahem, working for almost two full months by now, and what therefore will happen when I return to work, whihc hopefully, if I can get the doctor to sign the damn documents, will be next Thurs.

[Ruralguy]

Just one thing to note: Its not particularly possible to parse out what is "elderly related" to what "can happen to anyone" until perhaps much later in life when older folks more spontaneously collapse for a variety of reasons (unattended to cardiac issues, blood sugar issues, etc). A little earlier, its more about strength and balance issues, which tend to creep up on you unless you are very in tune with your own body (work out a fair bit or need frequent doctor visits that discuss such things).  That is to say, her 57 or 67 year old self may have been able to handle the canine situation a bit better without breaking bones. That being said, if she has an active strong dog, stuff like that will happen.

But anyway, it sounds like you are aware of that and maintaining vigilance without being hyper intrusive. The best of both worlds is her knowing she can depend on you if needed and that you have her back without taking control.

[Wahoo Redux]

My own health is improving

Very good news, my friend.  Hang in there!!!

[kaysixteen]

Thank you kindly.   Now I still gotsa get the doctor to sign the forms.