Topic: Bang Your Head on Your Desk - the thread of teaching despair!

[the_geneticist]

Dear TA,
When YOU ruin an experiment for an entire lab section of students because you didn't follow basic instructions, yes I will have you redo the setup for the class.
No, the other TAs don't "have to do this".  Why not?  They did it correctly the first time!
Will you please, please graduate so I never have to work with you again.

[AmLitHist]

I hereby submit my credentials retain my reputation as Destroyer of Dreams and Crusher of Souls (though FishProf's situation might actually beat me out):

--No, student, you can't magically have "remembered" that you didn't include a WC page on that final paper and now turn it in 4 days after I submitted final grades.  (She pulled this BS earlier in the semester--two weeks after that deadline--and I didn't buy it then, either.) I grade what you submit by the deadline.  Don't act like this is some big shock.

--I guess it's too bad you won't be graduating from HS, dual-enrolled kid who submitted TWO assignments all spring, and only got worried after I posted final grades.  It's not like I didn't send you FIVE "you need to withdraw or fail" emails since March, rack up four early alerts with Academic Advising, or submit three separate notices about you to the DE office that then also went directly to your HS--oh, wait, I DID. 

--You, other DE student, won't be graduating, either.  Giving me a BS list of non-existent sources as your WC page, in addition to nary an "according to" nor a sign of an in-text citation, along with similar notifications about your miserable performance all semester (like the other guy), all combined to seal that deal.  Enjoy sweating it out in summer school and/or hanging around for another semester. Smart money says you probably won't pass then, either.

--Similarly, after the same kinds and numbers of notifications as with the others above, Smart Ass Girl, you earned an F for the semester, not just based on your points, but because you plagiarized in exactly the same way on the two final major papers--after I'd read you the riot act on the first plagiarism.  (And yes, I know you're headed for your second semester of academic probation, not just because of me, but also because you raised so much hell trying to get my BFF colleague fired for "ruining your life" because you just "missed a few" assignments in her class--to the tune of only submitting 2 out of 30+ quizzes, discussions, tests, and assignments, and failing one of those).  I'm  probably a horrible person, but I'm loving seeing this one bite the dust, not only via probation but likely via a year's suspension on top of that, due to the plagiarisms.

All of these were Comp II students, who by the end of a sophomore-level class loaded with plagiarism avoidance and MLA documentation materials and assignments, should know better.

I can't express how glad I am that this spring is over--and I don't even much care that my summer classes look like they won't make (no matter how much I could use that money).

I'm honestly not a mean person.  I've helped a ton of students over the years, and I got better reviews and student comments this spring from more students than ever before.  But for jokers who want to screw around and play games, "ain't nobody got time for that," as they say.

[smallcleanrat]

I'm getting this question, only about exam scores.

Student: Why did I get a 0 on the "draw a [basket]" question?

Me: Because you left it blank.

Student: But, does that mean I did it wrong?

Ahhh, the old "Don't I start at 100% and only lose points for WRONG answers"?  schtick.

No, no child.  You start at zero.  You earn points for what you do correctly (i.e. points for things that are both relevant and true).

How does someone get all the way to college not understanding this?

Did they ever get 100% on an assignment or exam for turning in a blank piece of paper in K-12?

[FishProf]

Did they ever get 100% on an assignment or exam for turning in a blank piece of paper in K-12?

Probably not, but credit for homework that is just "complete" is a thing.

[Caracal]

Did they ever get 100% on an assignment or exam for turning in a blank piece of paper in K-12?

Probably not, but credit for homework that is just "complete" is a thing.

I mean that's kind of how I grade response papers. If you writes something that indicates that you at least sort of read the assigned reading, you get a 100. If they misunderstood the article, that's why we are going to talk about in class.

[FishProf]

Did they ever get 100% on an assignment or exam for turning in a blank piece of paper in K-12?

Probably not, but credit for homework that is just "complete" is a thing.

I mean that's kind of how I grade response papers. If you writes something that indicates that you at least sort of read the assigned reading, you get a 100. If they misunderstood the article, that's why we are going to talk about in class.

Yeah, me too.  If that becomes the expectation that students have for grading, maybe it could lead to what the_geneticist is asking about.  Maybe.

[the_geneticist]

Did they ever get 100% on an assignment or exam for turning in a blank piece of paper in K-12?

Probably not, but credit for homework that is just "complete" is a thing.

I mean that's kind of how I grade response papers. If you writes something that indicates that you at least sort of read the assigned reading, you get a 100. If they misunderstood the article, that's why we are going to talk about in class.

Yeah, me too.  If that becomes the expectation that students have for grading, maybe it could lead to what the_geneticist is asking about.  Maybe.

But I bet you'd give them a 0 if they turned in a blank piece of paper.
Plus, this was a midterm exam!

[Caracal]

Did they ever get 100% on an assignment or exam for turning in a blank piece of paper in K-12?

Probably not, but credit for homework that is just "complete" is a thing.

I mean that's kind of how I grade response papers. If you writes something that indicates that you at least sort of read the assigned reading, you get a 100. If they misunderstood the article, that's why we are going to talk about in class.

Yeah, me too.  If that becomes the expectation that students have for grading, maybe it could lead to what the_geneticist is asking about.  Maybe.

But I bet you'd give them a 0 if they turned in a blank piece of paper.
Plus, this was a midterm exam!

Well yes, or if they write something that doesn't seem to have anything to do with the reading at all.

[FishProf]

But I bet you'd give them a 0 if they turned in a blank piece of paper.
Plus, this was a midterm exam!

Well, yeah.  I'm not trying to justify it, only to understand it.

[FishProf]

[Double Post].  I am teaching a course that started today for the summer session.  Typically, the class runs with > 10 students, but it only drew 2, both of which need it for different reasons.  OK, fine, I'll get paid a little extra to retool the class for the fall and we can try put some new labs I've been eyeing.

So we meet.  I know both students, it goes great, this will be a good thing.  They get the whole rundown introductory "Top 10 Things You Need to Know" lecture and I send them on their way to get started, get their books, and take the syllabus quiz.  Time: 2:47pm.

I just got two emails from students who just joined.  Paraphrasing/combining.

"Hi.  I just joined your class that run from 1-4, but when I went to the room, there wasn't anyone there.  Did I miss anything?  Can you post a recording of the lecture?"

1) Yes, you missed class,
2) No, I didn't record the lecture, because everyone who was registered for the class was there.
3) I lest the room at 3, so you were at least two hours late.

[Antiphon1]

A student just asked if there were lecture recordings for. a 1 week class that started yesterday meaning he has missed 2 days or 40% of the class.  He didn't add until yesterday afternoon  (yes, I work at that sort of place) and didn't bother to email me until 5 minutes ago.  This will not be an easy conversation for him.

[history_grrrl]

I hereby submit my credentials retain my reputation as Destroyer of Dreams and Crusher of Souls (though FishProf's situation might actually beat me out):

....

I'm honestly not a mean person.  I've helped a ton of students over the years, and I got better reviews and student comments this spring from more students than ever before.  But for jokers who want to screw around and play games, "ain't nobody got time for that," as they say.

AmLitHist, I nearly always relate to your posts, and most definitely this one.

Had my last academic misconduct meeting the other day with Stu who pulled this crap (undoubtedly AI) on five separate assignments. Official meeting was about his two final essays, and include chair and campus academic integrity officer. After I outlined what I found and Chair asked Stu to explain the fake quotations, fake citations, fake sources, etc., Stu treated us to a litany of his problems: roommate moved out so he was stuck with the rent, prospect of failing my courses was causing stress and meant he had to drop his spring courses and would have to pay a whole extra year of tuition next year, etc., etc. Chair tried dragging him back to "the reason we're here." No dice; Stu simply had no explanation for these puzzling things about his papers.

By the end of this trainwreck, when we said we'd recommend 0 for both papers, Stu had the gall to ask if he could resubmit the essays and final exams so he can pass the class, because he's suddenly realizing he'll have two Fs on his transcript. I was too dumbfounded to reply. Luckily my god of a chair stepped in and told him to f--- off (not in those words, of course).

[Caracal]

Don't most colleges have explicit rules against doing this, however?  Indeed, how is writing one paper for two classes adequately fulfilling the need to do work for each course?

Yes, but I think there's a big difference between literally turning in the same paper (hard to imagine that working unless the assignment was *very* open ended anyway) and building on/looking at from another disciplinary perspective the same topic across classes, which is something I wish happened a lot more. If they want to do that I'm all for it and I'm not going to worry about whether some bits of text end up appearing in both papers. After all, the goal is learning, not producing widgets (at least my goal).

Right, it would be fine with me if a student took a few paragraphs from a paper they had written for another class as long as they were actually doing this in the process of creating a totally different essay. To borrow a phrase from copyright law, it needs to be transformed, rather than just patched together.

[the_geneticist]

But I bet you'd give them a 0 if they turned in a blank piece of paper.
Plus, this was a midterm exam!

Well, yeah.  I'm not trying to justify it, only to understand it.

My best guess is they 'speed ran' the exam, didn't realize they'd skipped those questions, and their surprise is that they can't just revise and resubmit for more points.
The whole "you can't fail me for something I didn't do" mindset. But, it's just my best guess.

[apl68]

I hereby submit my credentials retain my reputation as Destroyer of Dreams and Crusher of Souls (though FishProf's situation might actually beat me out):

....

I'm honestly not a mean person.  I've helped a ton of students over the years, and I got better reviews and student comments this spring from more students than ever before.  But for jokers who want to screw around and play games, "ain't nobody got time for that," as they say.

AmLitHist, I nearly always relate to your posts, and most definitely this one.

Had my last academic misconduct meeting the other day with Stu who pulled this crap (undoubtedly AI) on five separate assignments. Official meeting was about his two final essays, and include chair and campus academic integrity officer. After I outlined what I found and Chair asked Stu to explain the fake quotations, fake citations, fake sources, etc., Stu treated us to a litany of his problems: roommate moved out so he was stuck with the rent, prospect of failing my courses was causing stress and meant he had to drop his spring courses and would have to pay a whole extra year of tuition next year, etc., etc. Chair tried dragging him back to "the reason we're here." No dice; Stu simply had no explanation for these puzzling things about his papers.

By the end of this trainwreck, when we said we'd recommend 0 for both papers, Stu had the gall to ask if he could resubmit the essays and final exams so he can pass the class, because he's suddenly realizing he'll have two Fs on his transcript. I was too dumbfounded to reply. Luckily my god of a chair stepped in and told him to f--- off (not in those words, of course).

Another hard lesson in the consequences of one's actions and inactions.