Topic: Bang Your Head on Your Desk - the thread of teaching despair!

[fishbrains]

Yeah, that's particularly headbanging-worthy, Parasaurolophus.

In other quiz-related shenanigans, a student nearly handed in his quiz with no name on it. Apparently he handed in the previous with no name, either. The quiz before that? Didn't take it. Somehow I'm not very optimistic about his chances of passing...

A good student in my class has forgotten to write his name on two quizzes so far this term. The first time, I was able to figure out whose score was missing when I entered the grades in the spreadsheet. The second time, I recognized the handwriting and just filled in the name right away.

Hmmm... to my surprise, he actually got a perfect score on the quiz he did submit with no name. In any case, with over 50 students in this section, I can't be playing Sherlock Holmes with students who don't put their names on stuff. I made an announcement that in the future quizzes with no name will not be graded.
In other developments, several students are complaining about the upcoming exam's date and time, that they have a clash with work, etc. The date and time have been in the syllabus since day 1. I don't set the time, etc, the Chair does. For various reasons, it can't really be changed unless there's some force majeure situation. For those that don't take it, the final will replace it. I'm not looking forward to the likely situation of students complaining that they can't take the final and they didn't take this exam.

For quizzes in larger classes, I often make the last question, "What is your first and last name?" Not proud of it, but it works.

[Biologist_]

Why would you do that for him/her?  If they don't know they are doing it, they'll never change.

I did write the name in red pen. When I handed the quiz back, the student said something like "Oh no! I did it again?" loudly enough that nearby students laughed.

[FishProf]

Why would you do that for him/her?  If they don't know they are doing it, they'll never change.

I did write the name in red pen. When I handed the quiz back, the student said something like "Oh no! I did it again?" loudly enough that nearby students laughed.

Perhaps the power of the dreaded red pen will be a sufficient prod.

[Anon1787]

I double-checked, and Stu managed to score 0 correct out of 10 multiple-choice questions. Congratulations on beating the odds!

[marshwiggle]

I double-checked, and Stu managed to score 0 correct out of 10 multiple-choice questions. Congratulations on beating the odds!

Stu could monetize this. Send Stu's answer choices to other people (for a fee); it allows them to eliminate one possibility for each question, raising their odds significantly. If only Stu can be consistent, there's money to be made!

[OneMoreYear]

Dear student,
No matter how much you would like it to, your accommodation letter does not say: Student does not have to follow assignments instructions.

[the_geneticist]

Students, I warned you that if you email me with a question about your project that is answered in the project guidelines, scoring rubric, or other materials that I would reply "read [thing I gave you]".

Saying "But we are CONFUSED about [thing that is on the top of the page].  Do we need to do [thing that is listed as a required task on the top of the page]"

I sent back a screenshot with the [thing] highlighted saying "Yes, you are required to do [thing]"

If the same student writes back again, I'm going to cc their team and say "please talk".

[the_geneticist]

Sorry for the double-post.

But WOW did I get a doozy of a question:

"Do we have to include all of the data?  But what if they don't support our hypothesis?  Can we ignore those?"

Fantasy answer:  WHAT?!?! NO!  That's the opposite of how we do science! 

Real answer:  You need to include and analyze all of the data that are relevant to your question. 

[Puget]

Sorry for the double-post.

But WOW did I get a doozy of a question:

"Do we have to include all of the data?  But what if they don't support our hypothesis?  Can we ignore those?"

Fantasy answer:  WHAT?!?! NO!  That's the opposite of how we do science! 

Real answer:  You need to include and analyze all of the data that are relevant to your question.

Holy p-hacking! I would have given the fantasy answer, though in a bit of a different tone.

[marshwiggle]

Sorry for the double-post.

But WOW did I get a doozy of a question:

"Do we have to include all of the data?  But what if they don't support our hypothesis?  Can we ignore those?"

Fantasy answer:  WHAT?!?! NO!  That's the opposite of how we do science! 

Real answer:  You need to include and analyze all of the data that are relevant to your question.

Does anyone beside me imagine Stu deciding that data that don't support their hypothesis are therefore not relevant to their question?

[FishProf]

Sorry for the double-post.

But WOW did I get a doozy of a question:

"Do we have to include all of the data?  But what if they don't support our hypothesis?  Can we ignore those?"

Fantasy answer:  WHAT?!?! NO!  That's the opposite of how we do science! 

Real answer:  You need to include and analyze all of the data that are relevant to your question.

Does anyone beside me imagine Stu deciding that data that don't support their hypothesis are therefore not relevant to their question?

I'd bet folding money that they already think that is the case, and the way.

[the_geneticist]

Sorry for the double-post.

But WOW did I get a doozy of a question:

"Do we have to include all of the data?  But what if they don't support our hypothesis?  Can we ignore those?"

Fantasy answer:  WHAT?!?! NO!  That's the opposite of how we do science! 

Real answer:  You need to include and analyze all of the data that are relevant to your question.

Does anyone beside me imagine Stu deciding that data that don't support their hypothesis are therefore not relevant to their question?

I'd bet folding money that they already think that is the case, and the way.

I'm sure that's exactly what they think.  They won't know which data are supportive or not until they complete the analysis.  But they are so wanting to be "right" they want to remove data after.  Nope.  Just nope.

[kaysixteen]

Tell him to pass on a career in STEM and go to law school instead.

[mbelvadi]

Tell him to pass on a career in STEM and go to law school instead.

In the US at least, evren proscutors are required to turn over to the defense any exculpatory evidence they find.   https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Exculpatory_evidence

[marshwiggle]

Tell him to pass on a career in STEM and go to law school instead.

In the US at least, even proscutors are required to turn over to the defense any exculpatory evidence they find.   https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Exculpatory_evidence

But defense lawyers are not so limited. Picking and choosing what "facts" to present is very much the essence of presenting a case. (Actually, sales and/or marketing would also be a good choice for this student, for the same reason.)