The Post For Stuff You Wanna Tell People

[secundem_artem]

I just found out one of the students in one of my classes recently turned 15 yrs old. So she was only 14 when she entered college.  She's quite smart and very cute and I hope she does not just wind up as jail bait for a senior football player or frat bro.

[evil_physics_witchcraft]

Tomorrow is Free Comic Book Day (and Star Wars Day).

https://www.freecomicbookday.com/

[Puget]

Two good pieces of grant news in one day!
But I have a ton of work and grading to do. Finding it very hard to concentrate.

[Parasaurolophus]

Two good pieces of grant news in one day!
But I have a ton of work and grading to do. Finding it very hard to concentrate.

Congratulations!

[Puget]

Two good pieces of grant news in one day!
But I have a ton of work and grading to do. Finding it very hard to concentrate.

Congratulations!

Thank you! I'm really excited to get to do this work (which is a brand new direction for my lab) with a very cool team of collaborators. I just really need a couple weeks to catch my breath right now which I don't have. Definitely falls under the category of good problems to have though!

[apl68]

Congratulations on both the grants and the team, Puget!

[Langue_doc]

Text message on my cell phone:

Hello Firstname Middlename Lastname (not mine)
Person (I've never heard of) from Company (I've never heard of) needs you to complete verification on Two Dots as part of your rental application for Unit (number) by going to (website of company) and logging in with (email of the potential renter)

The text goes on to ask for verification of income and so on. Such carelessness in sending a text to an unknown person that includes the full name and email address of the rental applicant. Company, can't you even double check the phone number to make sure that you're texting the right person!?

[FishProf]

Text message on my cell phone:

Hello Firstname Middlename Lastname (not mine)...

Company, can't you even double check the phone number to make sure that you're texting the right person!?

Two Dots is an online game.  This is a scam sign-up text.

[Langue_doc]

Text message on my cell phone:

Hello Firstname Middlename Lastname (not mine)...

Company, can't you even double check the phone number to make sure that you're texting the right person!?

Two Dots is an online game.  This is a scam sign-up text.

They're probably legit. There was a reminder from them yesterday which I promptly deleted.

On an entirely differnt topic: I ordered a hat through Amazon. Hat arrived a couple of days ago in a 11x8.5x6 (all inches) box, and had inside a structure to to help the hat hold its shape. There was no hat. Took me a while to find a representative for a chat session (you can check a box to indicate a missed shipment, but there's no way to inform Amazon that the box was empty) who took care of the problem. Hat arrived today, slightly squished, in a 18x14x3.5 box. Same hat, different packaging. It's a summer hat, so I'm glad it arrived.

[AmLitHist]

Guilty verdicts on all 34 counts.  I'll be damned.

[evil_physics_witchcraft]

Guilty verdicts on all 34 counts.  I'll be damned.

Awesome!!!

[Parasaurolophus]

I'm feeling pretty anxious today. A couple of weeks ago, a friend with a similarly-aged toddler told us and a few other people about the abuse she's suffered from her partner since a few months after she gave birth to their toddler. It's really scary stuff which I haven't encountered before outside of film and TV; he hasn't been physically abusive yet, but he's clearly ramping up to it. They've been hiding in the closet during his tirades.

Actually, it really explains a lot that was going on, and which seemed really weird to us, including why she and her toddler never speak French, despite it being not just her first language, but far and away the one in which she's most comfortable (I always made sure to speak to them in French, and she always seemed weirdly relieved. Now we know why, along with many other things). They split their time between here and my home province, and he's clearly been working on isolating her more and more. The final straw for her came when he drove them to a new, off-the-grid cabin in the hinterlands of this province and told them he'd bought it and they'd be living there from now on.

So anyway, when we found out, we organized ourselves to get her on a plane back home, with enough cash to coast for as long as she needs to. Today is the day. But I'm really worried about it, because although he knows she's going back, he doesn't know she's leaving him, so... he's driving her to the airport (this is obviously not good, but she wasn't comfortable not doing it, and her legal counsel counselled against an abrupt departure).

In the last few days, before the cops came and told him to fuck off for a few days after the latest tirade, he was working on the kid (but obviously intending it for our friend), telling her about the cabin and how they were going to live in it, and our friend had to intervene a bunch to say they were going back east first. And last night, he announced that they were having brunch with his father before leaving.

I really, really, really don't like the sound of any of that. It's already a dangerous time, since she's leaving, and this all sounds to me like he may well just take them and drive into the hinterlands. We're tracking her phone and one of us will be following them, but I'm pretty worried about it.

[Langue_doc]

@para

Here's the link to the Domestic Violence Hotline; see topics on how to get help, identify abuse, plan for safety and support people being abused.

There's probably a Canadian counterpart, but if not, the information in the US website would be a good place to begin.

[ab_grp]

Sending good wishes to your friend and he kid, Para.  What a scary situation.  We had one in our neighborhood a year or two ago that escalated over time but then things started happening very quickly, and it didn't end well.  It's wonderful that you and your friends are trying to help her get away from this situation as best she can.  I wish it were as easy as just packing some things and getting out and being done with it.  I hope it works out!!

[poiuy]

Hi Para,  I have volunteered many years with a DV organization and helped to found one in my state.

First, thank you for being there for your friend and her child. It's great that you are supporting them to safety. You describe that she has legal counsel, which is another good thing. Tracking her phone and following her sound good, as long as the abuser doesn't realize it's happening and get triggered, putting everyone in more danger. 

Here is the link for DV resources in Canada: https://www.canada.ca/en/public-health/services/health-promotion/stop-family-violence/services.html

ETA: Here is another link: https://www.domesticshelters.org/en-ca/domestic-abuse-help-in-canada

You said that the police were previously involved. Do the police have a social worker, community liaison, or DV unit? Some areas do. You could talk with them on your friend's behalf describing your fears for her safety. Could they follow her to the airport for safety? Or do a safety check on her? I don't want to make you more anxious, but the risk of violence escalates when the victim is at the point of escaping.

In her destination she should be supported to contact the local DV organization and make a safety plan in consultation with them to ensure he doesn't shadow her there, what to do if he does, etc.

I wish your friend, her child, and all of you, the very best.  Please do update us here later as to how it turned out.