bad puns and dad jokes

[traductio]

What do you get when you cross a squid with a pear?

A square.

(Feel free to share your own bad puns and dad jokes.)

[scamp]

What do you get when you cross a mosquito and a mountain goat?

Don't be silly, you can't cross a vector with a scalar!
(I am hoping bad math jokes are allowed)

[FishProf]

(Say this out loud)

What do you call a fish with no eyes?

Fsh

[traductio]

What do you get when you cross a mosquito and a mountain goat?

Don't be silly, you can't cross a vector with a scalar!
(I am hoping bad math jokes are allowed)

All bad jokes are not only allowed but encouraged.

[Liquidambar]

My all-time favorite...

What's brown and sticky?

A stick.

[Kron3007]

How can you tell if a joke is a Dad joke? 

Because the punchline's a parent...

[traductio]

How can you tell if a joke is a Dad joke? 

Because the punchline's a parent...

My best friend in high school collected t-shirts that set up jokes. (That's a narrow category of t-shirts, but still he collected them.) His favorite simply had the letters "D D A" on the front. When people asked what that meant, he'd say, "When you rearrange the letters the answer is apparent."

(You saw that coming, didn't you.)

[clean]

For the 4- 6 year old crowd:

If you make a cow laugh really hard will milk come out of her nose?

[Bede the Vulnerable]

A woman is on trial for beating her husband with an electric guitar.  The judge:  "First time offender?"  She:  "No, first time a Gibson."

[clean]

where do horses stay when they visit a hotel?


The Bridle Suite (of course, of course)

[secundem_artem]

Doctor, my eye hurts when I drink a cup of coffee.

Have you tried taking the spoon out of the cup?

[Parasaurolophus]

What does a cat read on the toilet?

Litterature!

[traductio]

Yay! Post more -- I feel my supply is running low. (I'm a dad of two kids and they still think dad jokes are funny.)

[science.expat]

What do you get when you cross a mosquito and a mountain goat?

Don't be silly, you can't cross a vector with a scalar!
(I am hoping bad math jokes are allowed)

I'm not sure whether I should groan or share this. Maybe both ;-)

[polly_mer]

Why was Fauci's first pitch so far off base?

It's Fauci's job to prevent anyone from catching it.